I'm glad you enjoy PoE!
I agree with your point on rerolling and limited respeccing. I put more than 10 years of daily play into D2--when respec was added in D2 I was ecstatic, but I realized after a time exactly what you point out--D2 doesn't really have an endgame. That timesink for perfect stats/gear is what does it, and esp. that kick of serotonin unlocking new abilities on a fresh char early on. And then the cycle of getting gear with soft stats on it so you have to keep rerolling your char to optimize those stats. It was uncomplicated (my criticism of PoE--their endgame overcomplicates it imo) but the need to reroll (or high cost respeccing) is pivotal. So much of D2's experience was in rerolling that making respeccing so trivial really hampered it.
I also agree with your take on gearing, in that a build should not be completable in only a couple days. Most builds should be functional and competitive for endgame activities with modest investment imo but if endgame areas are trivial in a matter of less than a week then there is a significant problem. Imo D2 got this close to right, although I think rampant immunities in all endgame content was a cheap way of doing it (especially multi-immunity).
The core of this criticism is the gear/build relationship, in which D3 went the complete opposite way on both from D2. Imo the combat itself and the way you can customize skills was superior, but it feels like it came at the cost of everything else. D4 seems to have a cost for respec, but I'm hoping it's much steeper than D2 (have to clear endgame bosses a few times or trade for items, otherwise 3 resets max) and definitely higher than D3 (virtually free).
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I'm posting this here as well, since I'm hoping it gets some much needed attention (/ego)
As an avid ARPG lover I feel like a mark might be missed with the D4 release, and I'm really hoping it's not.
MMO vs ARPG - they are not the same
Re-rolling - make it a core part of the design
Item Rarity - it should take a veeeery long time to obtain the best of the best
Respec vs Reroll - in pursuit of "the perfect build"
Please give this some attention. If you want to understand why D2 did (and continues) to do so well, and why everyone flocked from D3 to PoE, it's not because people like running cows and maps over and over and over. It's because there's another build they want to try, and this time it's going to be perfect.