I feel like Blizzard just punched us all in the nuts. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I heard we were promised pictures, plural. I'm not picky about what, hell, just show me the wizard ownin some demons with her lazor.
What happened to the first 6 "ups"?
- There were actually 14 submitted, number 7 was the one the testers liked best. They were all the same.
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
- They can't count due to the fact that they have no fingers to count with.
Who were the beta testers for Preparation A through Preparation G?
- Hippies.
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
- Nothing in the dictionary is misspelled, it's just language evolving.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Love has no eyes, but I do.
If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand
words, how dangerous is a fax?
- Depends... What's the stats on it?
Why do women shave off their eyebrows, then paint them back on?
- It draws attention away from other areas of their physique.
Do bald people have 'bad head' days?
- Sunburn.
What does Queen Elizabeth sing during the British national anthem?
"God Save Me"?
- She uses the royal plural, "God save us."
If all is not lost, where is it?
- It's not lost, it's around here somewhere....
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
- Too much of a good thing, y'know?
What do you do when you discover an endangered animal
that eats only endangered plants?
- Boil some water and get ready for some endangered stew!
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe
him, but if he tells you that a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
- Don't act like you don't like peeling the paint off your finger like you're a snake shedding skin.
Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a "whack"?
- It just means you need to hit it, you know, whack it a bit to make it right.
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
- Walk to a different room and open it. Easy.
What is a "free" gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
- I can think of a few that aren't. Puppies. You have to feed them and clean up poo.
If Jesus was Jewish, what's he doing with a Mexican name?
- I'm not sure where we get "Jesus" from, tbh. His real name was closer to Joshua.
How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
- They're too busy working.
If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what, exactly, is fog horn made out of?
- Never heard of a tin whistle. Never seen a fog horn either, the weather always conspires against me.
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
- On Mars.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
- self-sabotage?
If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
- The ones that aren't working don't need the lottery.
If you pull the wings off of a fly, does it become a walk?
- No, a scuttle.
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you see okay?
- Not particularly. You see two of everything. That's twice as many words you have trouble with.
How can you "draw a blank"?
-
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
- Gorilla Glue, it sticks to everything.
Does 'virgin wool' come from sheep the shepherd hasn't caught yet?
- That's just gross... and yes.
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
- They should, especially if they expect people to show up to watch.
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
- But how do you get to the liquor store if you can't drive?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
- Pretty sure people just chain one to their trucks... No one gets paid for that.
If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year,
why are there locks on the doors?
- that's a misconception, why do you think it gets robbed so much?
what happens when you turn on the headlights?
- How is this an unanswered question?
Why do they but Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
- It's Morse code for spies.
Why do we drive on 'parkways' and park on 'driveways'?
- watch the parkway during rush hour and you'll see this simply isn't true.
Why is it that when you transport something by car
it's a shipment, and when you transport something
by ship it's called 'cargo'?
- The shipment is of cargo.
You know that little indestructible black box that is
used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane
out of that substance?
- Because boxes can't fly.
Why is it when you're driving and looking for an address,
you turn the volume on the radio down?
- The music is somehow a distraction....
If you throw a cat out the window does it become kitty litter?
- You'd shit yourself too if you were thrown out of a window.
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
- Abortion clinics.
When a cow laughs does milk come up her nose?
- Every cow I've seen doesn't take kindly to jokes and pranks.
How did a fool and his money get together in the first place?
- They met in a bar.
How do you get the deer to cross at the deer crossing signs?
- Yeah that's a definite misconception, there are no deer at crossing signs, they've learned to avoid them because of all the hunters.
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
- Whoever told you that you couldn't just wants them all to himself.
What is another word for thesaurus?
- Lexicon.
Why do they sterilize the needle for a lethal injection?
- In case it doesn't work, they don't want the inmate to get sick and die.
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
- Words with latin etymology are normally long due to they're actually many words strung shmushed together.
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- I'd ask one, but....
How do you know when it's time to tune bagpipes?
- Same way you know with everything else, I guess... When they start sounding out of tune.
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
- They don't like to eat their own kind. People that have been eating people taste odd.
When you choke a smurf what color does it turn?
- Black, like everyone else.
Do blind Eskimos have seeing eye sled dogs?
- Blind Eskimos don't survive very long, I'd say.
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream and yogurt?
- Because when yogurt starts smelling like rum, you know it's gone bad long ago.
How is styrofoam shipped?
- wrapped in things.
Why do they call it a T.V. set when you only get one?
- Because they try to sell you all sorts of things in the set. Like HDMI sockets an whatnot.
If you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer?
- you dont even have to use a gun
Do radioactive cats have 18 half lives?
- Yes. But it's slowly reduced over time at a decreasing rate.
What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?
- Indoor plumbing.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to
kill himself is it a hostage situation?
- No, it's just freaking creepy. I've got a friend on the police force that's been in that situation. Scariest story I've ever heard.
When you open a new bag of cotton balls should you throw the top one away?
- It took me a moment to get this one. I must be slow. And yeah, you want the fresher ones.
Why do they report power outages on T.V.?
- They're bragging that they're ok.
Does a fish get cramps after eating?
- It does if I've been fishing.
How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
- New and improved? If it's been improved, it's not new.
When it rains why don't sheep shrink?
- They're not cotton...
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
- Frequently... There'd be less wars.
Why is it you have a pair of pants but only one bra?
- I have no bra.
Why is the alphabet in that order?
- Tradition.
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
- The tears of those with reasoning abilities.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
- What's popularity if you have no one to look down on?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
- when there's a reply, and it says "what?"
What happens if you get scared half-to-death ...twice?
- you have a heart attack.
How is it possible to have a civil war?
- Well, it was originally called The War Between the States, I think.
If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide & seek does he
automatically lose because he can't find himself?
- 40 year olds shouldn't be playing hide & seek
If you lick the air does it get wet?
- It does if there was no humidity before hand.
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
- Only if you're Sherlock Holmes.
If a duck's quack can't echo, what about a human's fart?
- Oh, I've had farts that echo.
I saw it, and i think my favorite moment in the movie was the line "DO NOT CONFUSE MY APPETITE FOR APATHY!" He said it in all caps, I could tell.
In all seriousness, though, I'm sad they butchered mythology and I'm sad that there were people of races other than Scandinavian among the gods. I'm happy Yggdrasil made an appearance of sorts but they completely did it wrong. Still, I believe they got the Norsemen attitudes down decently and the characters had some depth to them. In the end, though, the movie felt lacking, like there wasn't enough story to justify the time spent watching it. Irritating.
I like stories, and if a movie is interesting and good at telling stories, I'll like it. I've read the first 3 volumes of the Priest comic and it's got some interesting character development. If the movie is anything like the comic, I'll probably watch it. Predictability isn't exactly a fault (M. Night Shyamalan, very little predictability, very irritating), and 3D's almost always a retarded gimmick now. Original art is incredibly rare and I don't expect it when I go to see a movie that has ads on tv. The amount of negativity in this review makes it seem like you expect everything to be new and different. I've helped my brother with his songwriting, and if there's anything I learned from music, it's that everything is derivative of everything else. Having similarities with something else doesn't make it bad art.
For clarification: I've not seen it yet. I could easily believe it's dreadful though.
off topic, I saw sucker punch a while back and now that it's stewed in my head for a bit, the movie was pretty awesome. It didn't make much sense, but that's not what it was going for. It was just a fun, good story.
She thought we made out a lot, when in reality I saw her twice a week and we'd kiss a total of 5 minutes. I think she was looking for a gay friend, or something, what with her asking me talk with her more even though we'd talk like 6 hours every day.
I wouldn't be surprised to hear one day that she's a lesbian. Who doesn't like kissing? And she sounds like she was emotionally needy and lacking confidence.
...she was pretty weird when it came to certain things...
Girls are always weird about something or another. And I will probably never quite get why.
So, ironically, there's a city nearby named Lebanon where I went to high school, and I got friends at college there and they say just about the same thing.
There's a huge gap between high school and college sophomore. Being independent during high school would lessen it, perhaps negating it entirely. That's been my experience so far. Age doesn't matter, but experience does. Experience forces maturation, and if all someone's experienced is high school drama, then the 22-23 yr old girl who knows more of the world and of what she wants out of it will most likely be bored and annoyed by the lack of drive. I know I would and have been, when in similar situations.
edit:
scyberdragon's always so fast.... you kinda beat me to it.
I've been reading the news and some threads on this site for ages, and discovered that this community is fairly awesome. That made me want to join and, because I couldn't think of any negatives (already a curse member) I DID! I'm super excited about it, but I can't blame you if you're somewhat apprehensive. The excitement could be the sleep deprivation and redbull talking. What made yall join?
That was a great article, I would've missed out on it if it hadn't been posted here. I'm a huge starcraft fan but I don't follow the news on it, I just go over to friends' houses and drink beer watching gsl tournaments.
I feel like Blizzard just punched us all in the nuts. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I heard we were promised pictures, plural. I'm not picky about what, hell, just show me the wizard ownin some demons with her lazor.
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0
4
What happened to the first 6 "ups"?
- There were actually 14 submitted, number 7 was the one the testers liked best. They were all the same.
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
- They can't count due to the fact that they have no fingers to count with.
Who were the beta testers for Preparation A through Preparation G?
- Hippies.
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
- Nothing in the dictionary is misspelled, it's just language evolving.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Love has no eyes, but I do.
If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand
words, how dangerous is a fax?
- Depends... What's the stats on it?
Why do women shave off their eyebrows, then paint them back on?
- It draws attention away from other areas of their physique.
Do bald people have 'bad head' days?
- Sunburn.
What does Queen Elizabeth sing during the British national anthem?
"God Save Me"?
- She uses the royal plural, "God save us."
If all is not lost, where is it?
- It's not lost, it's around here somewhere....
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
- Too much of a good thing, y'know?
What do you do when you discover an endangered animal
that eats only endangered plants?
- Boil some water and get ready for some endangered stew!
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe
him, but if he tells you that a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
- Don't act like you don't like peeling the paint off your finger like you're a snake shedding skin.
Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a "whack"?
- It just means you need to hit it, you know, whack it a bit to make it right.
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
- Walk to a different room and open it. Easy.
What is a "free" gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
- I can think of a few that aren't. Puppies. You have to feed them and clean up poo.
If Jesus was Jewish, what's he doing with a Mexican name?
- I'm not sure where we get "Jesus" from, tbh. His real name was closer to Joshua.
How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
- They're too busy working.
If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what, exactly, is fog horn made out of?
- Never heard of a tin whistle. Never seen a fog horn either, the weather always conspires against me.
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
- On Mars.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
- self-sabotage?
If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
- The ones that aren't working don't need the lottery.
If you pull the wings off of a fly, does it become a walk?
- No, a scuttle.
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you see okay?
- Not particularly. You see two of everything. That's twice as many words you have trouble with.
How can you "draw a blank"?
-
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
- Gorilla Glue, it sticks to everything.
Does 'virgin wool' come from sheep the shepherd hasn't caught yet?
- That's just gross... and yes.
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
- They should, especially if they expect people to show up to watch.
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
- But how do you get to the liquor store if you can't drive?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
- Pretty sure people just chain one to their trucks... No one gets paid for that.
If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year,
why are there locks on the doors?
- that's a misconception, why do you think it gets robbed so much?
what happens when you turn on the headlights?
- How is this an unanswered question?
Why do they but Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
- It's Morse code for spies.
Why do we drive on 'parkways' and park on 'driveways'?
- watch the parkway during rush hour and you'll see this simply isn't true.
Why is it that when you transport something by car
it's a shipment, and when you transport something
by ship it's called 'cargo'?
- The shipment is of cargo.
You know that little indestructible black box that is
used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane
out of that substance?
- Because boxes can't fly.
Why is it when you're driving and looking for an address,
you turn the volume on the radio down?
- The music is somehow a distraction....
If you throw a cat out the window does it become kitty litter?
- You'd shit yourself too if you were thrown out of a window.
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
- Abortion clinics.
When a cow laughs does milk come up her nose?
- Every cow I've seen doesn't take kindly to jokes and pranks.
How did a fool and his money get together in the first place?
- They met in a bar.
How do you get the deer to cross at the deer crossing signs?
- Yeah that's a definite misconception, there are no deer at crossing signs, they've learned to avoid them because of all the hunters.
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
- Whoever told you that you couldn't just wants them all to himself.
What is another word for thesaurus?
- Lexicon.
Why do they sterilize the needle for a lethal injection?
- In case it doesn't work, they don't want the inmate to get sick and die.
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
- Words with latin etymology are normally long due to they're actually many words strung shmushed together.
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- I'd ask one, but....
How do you know when it's time to tune bagpipes?
- Same way you know with everything else, I guess... When they start sounding out of tune.
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
- They don't like to eat their own kind. People that have been eating people taste odd.
When you choke a smurf what color does it turn?
- Black, like everyone else.
Do blind Eskimos have seeing eye sled dogs?
- Blind Eskimos don't survive very long, I'd say.
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream and yogurt?
- Because when yogurt starts smelling like rum, you know it's gone bad long ago.
How is styrofoam shipped?
- wrapped in things.
Why do they call it a T.V. set when you only get one?
- Because they try to sell you all sorts of things in the set. Like HDMI sockets an whatnot.
If you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer?
- you dont even have to use a gun
Do radioactive cats have 18 half lives?
- Yes. But it's slowly reduced over time at a decreasing rate.
What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?
- Indoor plumbing.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to
kill himself is it a hostage situation?
- No, it's just freaking creepy. I've got a friend on the police force that's been in that situation. Scariest story I've ever heard.
When you open a new bag of cotton balls should you throw the top one away?
- It took me a moment to get this one. I must be slow. And yeah, you want the fresher ones.
Why do they report power outages on T.V.?
- They're bragging that they're ok.
Does a fish get cramps after eating?
- It does if I've been fishing.
How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
- New and improved? If it's been improved, it's not new.
When it rains why don't sheep shrink?
- They're not cotton...
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
- Frequently... There'd be less wars.
Why is it you have a pair of pants but only one bra?
- I have no bra.
Why is the alphabet in that order?
- Tradition.
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
- The tears of those with reasoning abilities.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
- What's popularity if you have no one to look down on?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
- when there's a reply, and it says "what?"
What happens if you get scared half-to-death ...twice?
- you have a heart attack.
How is it possible to have a civil war?
- Well, it was originally called The War Between the States, I think.
If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide & seek does he
automatically lose because he can't find himself?
- 40 year olds shouldn't be playing hide & seek
If you lick the air does it get wet?
- It does if there was no humidity before hand.
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
- Only if you're Sherlock Holmes.
If a duck's quack can't echo, what about a human's fart?
- Oh, I've had farts that echo.
0
In all seriousness, though, I'm sad they butchered mythology and I'm sad that there were people of races other than Scandinavian among the gods. I'm happy Yggdrasil made an appearance of sorts but they completely did it wrong. Still, I believe they got the Norsemen attitudes down decently and the characters had some depth to them. In the end, though, the movie felt lacking, like there wasn't enough story to justify the time spent watching it. Irritating.
0
For clarification: I've not seen it yet. I could easily believe it's dreadful though.
off topic, I saw sucker punch a while back and now that it's stewed in my head for a bit, the movie was pretty awesome. It didn't make much sense, but that's not what it was going for. It was just a fun, good story.
0
I wouldn't be surprised to hear one day that she's a lesbian. Who doesn't like kissing? And she sounds like she was emotionally needy and lacking confidence.
0
Girls are always weird about something or another. And I will probably never quite get why.
So, ironically, there's a city nearby named Lebanon where I went to high school, and I got friends at college there and they say just about the same thing.
0
edit:
scyberdragon's always so fast.... you kinda beat me to it.
0