The Moomooer and the beast stared at the greenish, man-shaped translucent mist that floated towards them.
Nacho- You are a…ghost?
Macro- How did you kick down the door then?
Zhar- Was a fucking mage before so I still can draw from my magical powers in my spirit form.
Narrator- Could you lessen the use of the ‘F’ word please? If you can’t, I’ll have to censor you, you know. I can’t let kids be exposed to such profanity.
Zhar- Am fucking sorry man.
Nacho- This is strange. I have never heard of such a thing before. I mean no offense by it but can I ask…why are you cursing all the time?
Zhar- Aah…this is a f****** long tale my friends. Where to begin? Oh yes I was still…”
Macros- Am not your friend, you moron. Am not the friend of anybody!
Zhar- Eh? No f****** surprise there, seeing how rude you are.”
Nacho- Please continue, friend.
Zhar- Uhm…where was I? Oh yes, I was still a young mage -having just come of age- of the Moomoo clan when I wanted to see the world. I was aspiring to be a bard, you see. But training all the time and getting into f****** dangerous situations being part of the daily life routine, I thought I needed new sources of inspiration. So I left. The leader at that time tried to dissuade me from going but you know how reckless youth can be… Anywho, I departed and in time came to the Kanst Forest, located some miles North East to the Town of Deeha ‘Blothri. There was a rumor that there was the nest of some Viaax birds there and seeing how rare these flying bastards are, I decided to go and chance a glimpse of these rare magical creatures. Little did I know that I was actually heading into the territory of a f****** dangerous sorcerer! He had made the Kanst forest his home and when he came to know of my presence, his fury was terrible to behold. I remember that as I was nearing the very centre of the forest, I encountered some noob in a cloak and with a stick. But turned out it was the sorcerer. All I caught was that his name was Rykker. He then angrily brandished his staff and cursed me, shouting that I was breaking his ears or something like that! A curse that won’t allow me to sing or talk without f****** swearing.”
Nacho- The curse killed you?
Zhar- Ah f*** no. That was when I was running away from him. The whole weather had changed when I ventured into the forest- I guess I should have seen that as a bad omen. It was a very stormy day with motherf****** gusts that would blow the sh** out of you. Anyway when lightning and thunder started making the whole place look some hellish party, I went to shelter under a tree.
Then I still don’t f****** understand what happened. I just saw a white light and next thing I knew, I was a damn ghost. I wish I could move on you know but am stuck here and I don’t f****** know what to do.
I can’t even avenge myself. I thought I would haunt Rykker’s sh**hole of a castle when he just cursed me again! Now I cannot even approach his fortress and I find myself trapped in the Kairn caves. The way you are taking leads to his castle by the way and I was just drifting my a** around when I heard people shouting and attacking and I saw through the door a snake about to bite your f****** neck off, so I intervened.
Nacho- Thank you, Zhar. You saved my life. If I can repay you in any manner, please do tell me.
Zhar- Ya well…hmm… I know am asking for much here but if you could set me free, it would be me who would be in your debt. You could kick Rykker’s a**. I think that ought to break the curse and free me from f****** talking like this for my whole life, uhm I mean for my whole death. I would then finally be able to roam the world. Now that I can be invisible and go through doors, I can find some hot ch…*cough* I mean I can make myself useful by helping the world. Yeah, that’s right, I’ll help the world. I could accompany you even. Speaking of that, where are you from?
Nacho- I am from the Moomoo clan also.
Zhar- No sh**!!!! Damn, you are right- I see the emblem on your cloak.
Nacho- Yes we are indeed from the same place. I want you to know that I’ll gladly help you Zhar but right now, we need to find our friends. They might be in grave danger. Would you help us?”
Zhar- Sure man.
Mac- Hmpfff…. Also stop saying ‘we’. These people are ‘your’ friends. I am your ally only temporarily.
Nacho sighed, smiled and went to rummaging into the small bag he was carrying with him. While he was searching for whatever he was looking for, a battle of secret whispers was going on.
Zhar to Mac- Jealous cat is jealous.
Mac- I am a beast moron!
Zhar- So you do not deny that you are jealous? Hehehehe…
Mac- What? Can you make some sense here? Oh I guess that would too much to ask from someone who went to hide under a tree in a thunderstorm.
Zhar- What do you mean?
They were interrupted by the mage.
Nacho- Got it!
He drew from the bag the map given to him by Phrozen. The map showed the Kanst Forest was indeed not far from the Town of Deetha ‘Blothri and it would seem the caves were in fact a vast underground passage that connected the two. He considered for a moment.
Nacho- Zhar, since you roam around here, would you per chance have seen a guard of the nearby Town in the caves a couple of days ago?
Zhar’s misty hand went to scratch his non-existant head. He then exclaimed loudly,
“I have actually! I think his name was Jeru. At least that’s what he said when they were interrogating him.”
Nacho, alarmed- Interrogating? Who was there?
Zhar- Oh it was a scary-looking guy, skull with no eyes with scepter in hand and smelling like a sorcerer. So I stayed far you know. Getting cursed a third time would have killed me- figure of speech. Anywho, I kept discreet and spied on them, seeing that I am almost always mightily bored with nothing to do here. There was that other guy; I think his name was Venom- I heard the scary guy giving him orders. Well the sorcerer had apparently lured this guard in the cave and was talking about getting his hands on and destroying the Stone of Jordan of the Town. He was trying to get the guard to reveal its exact location.
---------------------------------------End of episode5------------------------------------
Phrozen- How long has that ghost guy been haunting the cave?
Zhar- Dude, you do not ask such f****** questions. It's rude- a bit like asking a middle-aged lady her age.
What is the next step for Nacho and his 2 new allies? What happened to Jet and Ferret?
Is Jeru still alive? Is that scary skull guy, that bastard of Shatterer?
All of these answers will be revealed in the next episode of Dfans the movie.
Narrator- A rather short after episode chat for today folks. Some other bonus this time. Enjoy.
The necromancer stood atop a small jut of the land, his eyes trying to pierce the thick mist that had settled over the swamp. It was near nightfall and the throbbing silence that pervaded his surroundings seemed to conceal an evil that was secretly bidding its time.
Sure enough, the pale man could feel some sinister presence lurking just out of sight.
Then suddenly, the lingering shadows began to grow and crawl along the ground but then started fading as the feeble light from the setting sun marked the end of long dark day.
As if the departure of the celestial being was some kind of long awaited signal, a shallow whisper carried through the air, echoing around the swamp as if it was some forbidding chamber of some unfathomably cruel creature.
“You are mine now, necromancer.”
A terrible enemy appeared. A sickly green light burned within the empty sockets of the skull and in its bony hands was a great scythe scribbled with spells and words of power that the servants of Hell only knew.
The priest of Rathma wasted not a single moment. He recognized the sorcerer, lieutenant of the Lord of Terror and understood he would have a deadly battle to fight.
Summoning his magical energy within, he called out as a water golem rose from the grou…
Narrator- “ What do you mean, what?”
Necro- “Dude, I can’t summon a water golem.”
Narrator- “Are you kidding me? If I say you can, you can and that’s it!”
Necro- “But it ain’t in my skill tree! My only elemental golem which is a fire one in case you didn’t know is at level 30 and am like level 1 right now…”
Woman-dressed-like-an-elf- “Am not an elf, idiots. My name is Jaina Proudmoore. Am human…or something like that…am also an archmage…hmm…ya…well…uhm…I mean lol at the noob necromancer. He can’t even raise a water golem. That’s like my level 1 skill. Ha!”
Necro- “What are you talking about, woman? Your level one skill, eh? How many have skills you got?”
Jaina- “That’s besides the point noob. You can’t do it and that’s it. Haha…total pawnage there…”
Narrator to prime evils and woman-dressed-like-an-elf-“What are you guys doing here? You are messing up the story, we are not reaching you after the end of the act. And Jaina I don’t even have you in my scripts at all!”
Diablo in a disappointed voice- “Meh…I thought you were an elfz. We don’t have elfz here in Sanctuary. Why are you dressed like one though?”
Jaina- “How would you know I dress like one if you have never seen one?”
In the first episode of the first season, the chars begin to question this but the Narrator is a ruthless guy. He wants his written story to be a movie having seasons and be in episodes. Can't argue with that.
woot!!! what are those chars there in the end??? lol @baal only laughing
This was designed to be much longer- would have probably gotten its own thread. As it is it's a really shortened version, mainly due to time constraints.
To answer your question, it's necro and the prime evils, though there was supposed to be barby and the sorceress there.
I didn't get time to refine their roles and it also kind of ended abruptly. Oh well...
WTF. How can this brilliant movie-like-topic avoid me?! Great job Nekro, I really needing something a bit more relaxing to read.
Thanks Doom, glad you liked it. :biggrin:
And don't mind Mephy. Therapy has really helped him you know. You are quite new here but some time ago, he used to think he was that badass ballerina and he was lecturing everybody on the rules of dancing and that wearing a pink tutu was the shitz. We are expecting full recovery within the next 20 years.