In order to prepare for the BRUTAL awesomeness of Diablo 3, I was thinking there shud be a guide so that one could live to be the best Barbarian they could be, so heres my ideas(following these tips may result in epic lulz or ???) Its just a stupid, but fun idea, dont take it too seriously, seriously.
Barbarian Movies:
Watch Beowulf (2007 cgi-version), Conan the Barbarian (With Schwarzennegger), Korgoth of Barbaria, 300, and anything related to The Incredible Hulk.
Barbarian Video Games:
Diablo (duh), the new Conan game, Beowulf, Viking, God of War, God of War 2, Overlord (One of the most badass games ever invented), Warhammer: Mark of Chaos
Barbarian Music:
Any for of METAL! Especially Dethklok (from Metalocalypse), Motorhead, Beowulf Soundtrack, Finntroll, Einherjer
Barbarian Activities:
Getting HUGE!(At the gym), Eating, Rampaging
Barbarian Foods:
Meat of every friggin kind, I cant figure out tho whether its more BRUTAL to eat it hella rare or hella burnt, eggs,
Barbarian Names:
Bloodaxe Doomfeast, Bruticus Demonsbane, Warblade Doomblood, etc.
As the shadow once again crawls across our world...
...the stench of terror drifts on a bitter wind,
The people pray for strength and guidance ..
they should pray for the mercy of a swift death
for I have seen what the darkness hides.
In order to prepare for the BRUTAL awesomeness of Diablo 3, I was thinking there shud be a guide so that one could live to be the best Barbarian they could be, so heres my ideas(following these tips may result in epic lulz or ???) Its just a stupid, but fun idea, dont take it too seriously, seriously.
Barbarian Movies:
Watch Beowulf (2007 cgi-version), Conan the Barbarian (With Schwarzennegger), Korgoth of Barbaria, 300, and anything related to The Incredible Hulk.
Barbarian Video Games:
Diablo (duh), the new Conan game, Beowulf, Viking, God of War, God of War 2, Overlord (One of the most badass games ever invented), Warhammer: Mark of Chaos
Barbarian Music:
Any for of METAL! Especially Dethklok (from Metalocalypse), Motorhead, Beowulf Soundtrack, Finntroll, Einherjer
Barbarian Activities:
Getting HUGE!(At the gym), Eating, Rampaging
Barbarian Foods:
Meat of every friggin kind, I cant figure out tho whether its more BRUTAL to eat it hella rare or hella burnt, eggs,
Barbarian Names:
Bloodaxe Doomfeast, Bruticus Demonsbane, Warblade Doomblood, etc.
anything else?
i'm not a big fan of metal...
a name that will fit... my barb name was.. Bambi.. just a thought...
food, i think tehy will like beagles. ... i mean who doesnt like them..
mm... movie... not beowolf... that more of a druid type movie...
cant think of one...
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
We gotta make a change...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive. Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin) ~~us West Ladder~~
I would have a real axe but if you come at me with an axe I'd rather have a shotgun. Shotgun>axe any day of the week.
Erm, yeah, that's true I just use my axe (it's a hand axe) to split firewood, though. I can't picture myself swinging it at another person like a homicidal maniac A.K.A. Barbarian.
Erm, yeah, that's true I just use my axe (it's a hand axe) to split firewood, though. I can't picture myself swinging it at another person like a homicidal maniac A.K.A. Barbarian.
i can
*blizz cancels Diablo 3*:P
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
We gotta make a change...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive. Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin) ~~us West Ladder~~
Why is 13th Warrior not on that list of movies, and Eaters of the Dead not on the list of books. As should be the Gotrek and Felix series of books.
And anything to do with the Minsc the barbarian from Rashemen, and his quest to be accepted into the Ice Dragon Berserker Lodge. And before I forget, Korgan Bloodaxe, the money hungry, foul mouthed, arrogant, axe totting, bloodlusting dwarf Berserker from Talthalra Wern'nt Szithla Har'oloth.
-Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange. In those days, we really believed that to be the world's one, and only, truth.
HOLY CRUD! This is getting moar Brutal with every post!
I wonder how a Barbarian would attend jury Duty, or meet his in-laws, or do math tests, or be the best man at his friends wedding. Thinking like a Barbarian can lead to many comical situations IMO.
I wonder how a Barbarian would attend jury Duty, or meet his in-laws, or do math tests, or be the best man at his friends wedding.
Well first he would not only be on the jury duty but be the executioner, probably with his thunder axe of doom, hack it to pieces stand on his desk and shout "I KILL MATH TEST, ME SMART!", prolly with the main couse, freshly killed, hung over his shoulder:thumbsup:
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Can't you all see Diablo is just pubescent? He's not evil he's just a teenager!"
"Then how do you explain all the dead people?"
"Uhh they were accidents!"
"Oh ok we thought it was because he was a Prime Evil, oh well good day to ya"
A barbarian has no need for a jury, one can test their innocence or guilt by a trial. Usually a test of strength or prowess. If you can break a stone in half with a sword you are innocent, if you cannot, guilty.
Most believe barbarians to be uncivilized oafs. Barbarians actually have a strong sense of loyalty and honor. He would seek to make sure his sons were as strong as he is.
If Bors down the road is a great warrior, one I admire, I might try prove my worth to him in the hopes of marrying his daughter, so that my sons will share his lineage too, and may even be greater warriors than I.
Not so sure on the best man thing, as I have not studied the cultures of such people's in a long time. You have the Groom the bride and the minister and the families gathering behind. That is all that is needed. But were a barbarian to appear as the best man in a wedding ceremony of today, hmm. He would do so gladly I think. His friend is marrying a woman who will provide him with sons to carry on his name. Few things have a deeper meaning that that in the world of a babrarian.
Math is a difficult subject, one might think it useless in the life of a barbarian. But I need to know how to count so to tally up my kills, or to know that I am not exhausting my food supply.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
-Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange. In those days, we really believed that to be the world's one, and only, truth.
In todays society they would need to all play American football because that sport is freaking BRUTAL. I dont care if you can bash the sport all day but the people that step onto the playing field padded up and ready to kill are freaking WARRIORS/ BARBARIANS
Also they should be on the weight lifting team so that they are "swoul"
They should all drive semi trucks for savageness.
They should all throw shot put in Track and Field.
(Because it is clear the best of them have barbarian blood as they do warcries after each toss)
Also they would go to war often with people like....PETA...vegetarians.......hippies.......pop singers.....
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"I want to say something but I'll keep it to myself I guess and leave this useless post behind to make you aware that there WAS something... "
-Equinox
"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
Unfortunately they seem to pick semi smart to on the odd occasion rocket scientist-esque intelligence, people for those kinds of shows, people of the barbarian's intelligence are perhaps more often found on Jerry Springer having a go at each other, or better yet, in a ring surrounded by hundreds of people chanting their name as the engage in test of strength, endurance, dexterity, with others of a similar level of intelligence.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
-Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange. In those days, we really believed that to be the world's one, and only, truth.
Imagine a barbarian on one of those quiz shows specifically the spelling ones:
"Hmm I want to buy vowel"
"you already bought too many vowels, the letters B-L-A-A-A-U-U-R-R-G-K-H-H dont spell anything!"
*Barbarian looks confused, then angry as he picks up his axe*
"BLAAAUURRGKHH!"
*splorch splat*
Oh and /agree with Umpa65 American Football is hella brutal, along with Hockey too IMO
Maybe Hockey is even more Barbarian because they promote often individual bouts of fist to face action when in football these one on one confrontations never happen nearly as often. The hockey fights give that extra dimension of manliness with the one on one thing because they are all alone being watch and chanted at by everyone to win, it would take major balls to step on ice knowing that you could get into a one on one fight to the death....or...a fight to the slip and fall. BUT EITHER WAY...it is brutal.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"I want to say something but I'll keep it to myself I guess and leave this useless post behind to make you aware that there WAS something... "
-Equinox
"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
Good point! In that case, i would love to see a Barbarian try to get into American Idol, and then when Simon insults him he goes into a berserker rage, that would be epic!
Barbarians have songs of great warriors. So of the most amazing I have ever heard. Yes I have heard some epic poems by peoples we would deem barbaric.
I'd gladly listen to an epic poem about a young man who fought with trolls and dragons and became a king of all he surveys, than some disposable tripe about raising your hands in the air and waving them like you just don't care or some mindless garbage about getting low till the sweat drips of your balls.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
-Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange. In those days, we really believed that to be the world's one, and only, truth.
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Barbarian Movies:
Watch Beowulf (2007 cgi-version), Conan the Barbarian (With Schwarzennegger), Korgoth of Barbaria, 300, and anything related to The Incredible Hulk.
Barbarian Video Games:
Diablo (duh), the new Conan game, Beowulf, Viking, God of War, God of War 2, Overlord (One of the most badass games ever invented), Warhammer: Mark of Chaos
Barbarian Music:
Any for of METAL! Especially Dethklok (from Metalocalypse), Motorhead, Beowulf Soundtrack, Finntroll, Einherjer
Barbarian Activities:
Getting HUGE!(At the gym), Eating, Rampaging
Barbarian Foods:
Meat of every friggin kind, I cant figure out tho whether its more BRUTAL to eat it hella rare or hella burnt, eggs,
Barbarian Names:
Bloodaxe Doomfeast, Bruticus Demonsbane, Warblade Doomblood, etc.
anything else?
...the stench of terror drifts on a bitter wind,
The people pray for strength and guidance ..
they should pray for the mercy of a swift death
for I have seen what the darkness hides.
Wait that's Axe Body Spray...
But yea, seriously, this is the best thread ever. Lots of laughs.
Though I really don't like Barbarians. We need reqs for casters.
i'm not a big fan of metal...
a name that will fit... my barb name was.. Bambi.. just a thought...
food, i think tehy will like beagles. ... i mean who doesnt like them..
mm... movie... not beowolf... that more of a druid type movie...
cant think of one...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.
Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners
SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin)
~~us West Ladder~~
THIS IS MY BOOMSTICK!
Erm, yeah, that's true I just use my axe (it's a hand axe) to split firewood, though. I can't picture myself swinging it at another person like a homicidal maniac A.K.A. Barbarian.
i can
*blizz cancels Diablo 3*:P
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.
Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners
SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin)
~~us West Ladder~~
/spam.
And anything to do with the Minsc the barbarian from Rashemen, and his quest to be accepted into the Ice Dragon Berserker Lodge. And before I forget, Korgan Bloodaxe, the money hungry, foul mouthed, arrogant, axe totting, bloodlusting dwarf Berserker from Talthalra Wern'nt Szithla Har'oloth.
Talthalra - Meeting, Council, Parley
Wern'nt - Southeast
Szithla - Thirteen (13)
Har'oloth - The Underdark
In the drow Language.
But that is minor compared to having nothing furthermore to do with this crock pot
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZ5Hpn9UnrI&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5neBDIzIMdg&feature=related
I wonder how a Barbarian would attend jury Duty, or meet his in-laws, or do math tests, or be the best man at his friends wedding. Thinking like a Barbarian can lead to many comical situations IMO.
Well first he would not only be on the jury duty but be the executioner, probably with his thunder axe of doom, hack it to pieces stand on his desk and shout "I KILL MATH TEST, ME SMART!", prolly with the main couse, freshly killed, hung over his shoulder:thumbsup:
"Then how do you explain all the dead people?"
"Uhh they were accidents!"
"Oh ok we thought it was because he was a Prime Evil, oh well good day to ya"
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] <--- My band
Myspace.com/lostbandmusic <--- My bands site
Me <--- The second nerdiest member of my band
Nerd Pride <--- I has it
Most believe barbarians to be uncivilized oafs. Barbarians actually have a strong sense of loyalty and honor. He would seek to make sure his sons were as strong as he is.
If Bors down the road is a great warrior, one I admire, I might try prove my worth to him in the hopes of marrying his daughter, so that my sons will share his lineage too, and may even be greater warriors than I.
Not so sure on the best man thing, as I have not studied the cultures of such people's in a long time. You have the Groom the bride and the minister and the families gathering behind. That is all that is needed. But were a barbarian to appear as the best man in a wedding ceremony of today, hmm. He would do so gladly I think. His friend is marrying a woman who will provide him with sons to carry on his name. Few things have a deeper meaning that that in the world of a babrarian.
Math is a difficult subject, one might think it useless in the life of a barbarian. But I need to know how to count so to tally up my kills, or to know that I am not exhausting my food supply.
In todays society they would need to all play American football because that sport is freaking BRUTAL. I dont care if you can bash the sport all day but the people that step onto the playing field padded up and ready to kill are freaking WARRIORS/ BARBARIANS
Also they should be on the weight lifting team so that they are "swoul"
They should all drive semi trucks for savageness.
They should all throw shot put in Track and Field.
(Because it is clear the best of them have barbarian blood as they do warcries after each toss)
Also they would go to war often with people like....PETA...vegetarians.......hippies.......pop singers.....
-Equinox
"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
"Hmm I want to buy vowel"
"you already bought too many vowels, the letters B-L-A-A-A-U-U-R-R-G-K-H-H dont spell anything!"
*Barbarian looks confused, then angry as he picks up his axe*
"BLAAAUURRGKHH!"
*splorch splat*
Oh and /agree with Umpa65 American Football is hella brutal, along with Hockey too IMO
-Equinox
"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
I'd gladly listen to an epic poem about a young man who fought with trolls and dragons and became a king of all he surveys, than some disposable tripe about raising your hands in the air and waving them like you just don't care or some mindless garbage about getting low till the sweat drips of your balls.