I'm not talking about pedophilia, I'm talking in general. Let's say the guy is 18, and the girl is 21, should the age gap matter if the guy is as mature as a 22 year old? I had this girlfriend when I was 17 who was a university junior, and she kept bitching about the age gap, even though I was eons ahead of her in every department. I know it's normal for a guy to date a younger girl, but what's your take/experience/opinion with regards to an older girl dating a younger guy ?
Best relationship i ever had was with a woman 4 years older than me. She felt the same way back then, not sure i was ready, though. I was 19 and had i met her now, i'd definitely marry her. Oh well...
Well as someone who has been married to an older woman for six years, albeit only two years, I think I can shed some light on this for you mephy. When she talked about your age, it wasn't the number that bothered. It was maturity. And while you say you were ahead of her in every area, this is just not true. Men and women's ideal of maturity. You may have felt you were smarter, wiser, and even more together than she was. However, that is not what she was looking for in maturity. Please take no offense to this but I've seen how you act on these forums. If this is any indication of how you are in real life, then I understand why she felt you were not mature enough for her.
When it comes down to it, men and women just think differently and want different things out of a relationship. Once you can realize this and realize what it is she is looking for and needs, then the age won't matter because your maturity will be where it needs to be.
Personally, I am not a very "mature" person. I act like a kid sometimes and do crazy stuff. However, I understand my wife and what she needs and that's what is important.
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There's a huge gap between high school and college sophomore. Being independent during high school would lessen it, perhaps negating it entirely. That's been my experience so far. Age doesn't matter, but experience does. Experience forces maturation, and if all someone's experienced is high school drama, then the 22-23 yr old girl who knows more of the world and of what she wants out of it will most likely be bored and annoyed by the lack of drive. I know I would and have been, when in similar situations.
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scyberdragon's always so fast.... you kinda beat me to it.
I don't act the way I do on here with girls, especially if its my girlfriend. I was honest to God the best boyfriend I could be, and a bestfriend of mine even told me how not one guy she's been with has been so considerate and ideal. I was with her for 3 months and I didn't even make one sexual advance, unless you call kissing one. Hell, everytime she'd bring up the age issue she'd apologize a couple of hours later saying how she's wrong and how I'm great and all that jibber jabber. When I'm being serious, I'm as mature as they come..hell, even cab drivers seem to think so. If you know what all the guys over here are like, you'd think my personality is a clever facade. I guess the fault was in that girl because she was pretty weird when it came to certain things, and it was partly my fault for putting up with it, but I can assure you with 100% confidence that it wasn't about the maturity difference or anything like that.
There's a huge gap between high school and college sophomore. Being independent during high school would lessen it, perhaps negating it entirely. That's been my experience so far. Age doesn't matter, but experience does. Experience forces maturation, and if all someone's experienced is high school drama, then the 22-23 yr old girl who knows more of the world and of what she wants out of it will most likely be bored and annoyed by the lack of drive. I know I would and have been, when in similar situations.
edit:
scyberdragon's always so fast.... you kinda beat me to it.
Lebanon is very small, meaning that everyone still lives with their parents when they go into university, even begin work, especially since pays here are crap and rents are through the roof. There is no highschool drama here, not like other countries, and through experience, I can tell you that university doesn't differ that much from school over here. It's a fucked up country.
...she was pretty weird when it came to certain things...
Girls are always weird about something or another. And I will probably never quite get why.
So, ironically, there's a city nearby named Lebanon where I went to high school, and I got friends at college there and they say just about the same thing.
She thought we made out a lot, when in reality I saw her twice a week and we'd kiss a total of 5 minutes. I think she was looking for a gay friend, or something, what with her asking me talk with her more even though we'd talk like 6 hours every day.
She thought we made out a lot, when in reality I saw her twice a week and we'd kiss a total of 5 minutes. I think she was looking for a gay friend, or something, what with her asking me talk with her more even though we'd talk like 6 hours every day.
I wouldn't be surprised to hear one day that she's a lesbian. Who doesn't like kissing? And she sounds like she was emotionally needy and lacking confidence.
She thought we made out a lot, when in reality I saw her twice a week and we'd kiss a total of 5 minutes. I think she was looking for a gay friend, or something, what with her asking me talk with her more even though we'd talk like 6 hours every day.
I wouldn't be able to live there. Definitely not! Making out is my favorite thing to do before (and after) sex. I remember making out for hours in my first relationship (before we actually had sex).
Yeah, it was pretty stale. 3 months of only kissing should earn me some kind of fucking award, and she was still nagging. Mature my ass. Kissing is pretty basic and pretty damn nice..I didn't really get all her rants, what with her telling me I'm a great kisser, then telling me we should kiss less and talk more. I'm gonna toss a toaster the next time I get into the bath tub to see if I can know what women are thinking afterwards.
I will try and avoid dating younger guys only because of the experiences I have had up until now. I hate to stereotype all people younger than me, but so far I've had only bad experiences.
I am going to take some time to myself for now and not get into anything too serious. Just have a good (safe) time for a little. Then when I get myself together and mature a little more myself I will look for someone a little older than me.
If the circumstances are right and you are really passionate when you kiss( I'm not talking about mouth biting), then the girl should get insta wet and things should go places. And for some reason the girls I've dated all requested something called "me time." Which has something to do with talking to them from the moment I wake to the moment they talk me to sleep.
And about the age thing, who cares what the age is as long as you found who you're looking for right? Everyone is different.
Unless you are some playboy bunny in your 20's marrying an 80 year old rich man, well then shit, you better damn well suck those balls if you're just in it for the money. Whore.
Age is not nearly as important as the cognitive development.
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"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
Depends on what ages I guess. The difference in an 18 and 21 year old are pretty big. Not so much with maturity as where they are in life. By the age of 21 you're probably already on a path that will lead you where ever you're going to end up in life, but at 18 you're just starting that. So a 21 year old with no real goals could really mess up an 18 year olds life, because we all know "love" at that age >>> everything.
I think age becomes a problem with girls having low self-esteem in certain departments. They are probably thinking how well they will hold out on the long term, considering that youth is associated with attractiveness and they can only lose points there as time moves on.
Taking into account our actual lifespans, I would say this behavior becomes irrational when an age difference of <8( yay for random number) years suddenly becomes relevant to the person. I am talking about adults here obviously.
Just my thoughts anyway.
Yeah I think generally when it's a guy dating a girl that's 3+ years younger he's usually taking advantage of her age in some way or another. At least in the 18-25 range.
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
When it comes down to it, men and women just think differently and want different things out of a relationship. Once you can realize this and realize what it is she is looking for and needs, then the age won't matter because your maturity will be where it needs to be.
Personally, I am not a very "mature" person. I act like a kid sometimes and do crazy stuff. However, I understand my wife and what she needs and that's what is important.
Find any Diablo news? Contact me or anyone else on the News team
edit:
scyberdragon's always so fast.... you kinda beat me to it.
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
Lebanon is very small, meaning that everyone still lives with their parents when they go into university, even begin work, especially since pays here are crap and rents are through the roof. There is no highschool drama here, not like other countries, and through experience, I can tell you that university doesn't differ that much from school over here. It's a fucked up country.
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
Girls are always weird about something or another. And I will probably never quite get why.
So, ironically, there's a city nearby named Lebanon where I went to high school, and I got friends at college there and they say just about the same thing.
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
I wouldn't be surprised to hear one day that she's a lesbian. Who doesn't like kissing? And she sounds like she was emotionally needy and lacking confidence.
I wouldn't be able to live there. Definitely not! Making out is my favorite thing to do before (and after) sex. I remember making out for hours in my first relationship (before we actually had sex).
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
I am going to take some time to myself for now and not get into anything too serious. Just have a good (safe) time for a little. Then when I get myself together and mature a little more myself I will look for someone a little older than me.
And about the age thing, who cares what the age is as long as you found who you're looking for right? Everyone is different.
Unless you are some playboy bunny in your 20's marrying an 80 year old rich man, well then shit, you better damn well suck those balls if you're just in it for the money. Whore.
-Equinox
"We're like the downtown of the Diablo related internet lol"
-Winged
Taking into account our actual lifespans, I would say this behavior becomes irrational when an age difference of <8( yay for random number) years suddenly becomes relevant to the person. I am talking about adults here obviously.
Just my thoughts anyway.
Surely it matters at least some...
Eh?
Most couples usually consist the male being older one. So unless you are condoning pedophilia I honestly don't know what you mean to say here...