(Note: You must read all this, and the 4 articles at the bottom of this post to answer the poll)
Well, I think there are other threads like this, but I'm going to make this one anyways. We all have our opinions on sex, and how soon or often. I personally am very conservative in this regard, seeing all the potential STD's out there and how rampant it sees to be. However, I just found some things that have validated my views and opinions on teen sex and such, take a look at these articles. I'll summarize them, but it will be broad and you guys are still expected to read the articles before you can join the conversation.
Sex apparently is going down! Teens today are practicing abstinence more than those of the 90's. What this means is that for all of us who are abstinent there are more and more of us around, even if they don't admit it. Teens that don't engage in premarital sex are %100 more likely to not get a girl pregnant before marriage, and %100 less likely to get an STD. Kids that wait till they get married are more likely to have a stronger relationship, a more loving one, and be in better shape to have a baby that doesn't become a juvenile or loser.
My opinions are that abstinence is the way to go, STD's suck, and a GIGANTIC majority of ways to get an STD is go have sex with multiple people, which happens alot if you have premarital sex. And all if not most guys can agree with me, we don't want to marry a girl that has had a ton of guys in her before. Don't mean to be so blunt, but thats just the way it is. I would prefer to marry a virgin girl, instead of a slut. Girls as far as I've been told do as well. And the reason for this, is because virgin=good, slut=bad.
There are those of you that will bash me for what I'm saying, but I don't think that I'm saying something that you don't feel. Of course there will be those of you who are unsalvageable, but whether you are or not is decided by this question: "Do you want your daughter to be the school slut?"
I'll say some more and open up to the forum, but do you guys agree or disagree? Should teens be more active sexually, or should they wait for marriage or at least after-high school? I honestly believe, and I practice what I preech, that at least till after high school, but marriage is the way to go.
There are the articles I read, read these before you answer the poll. I know its alot to read, but I would like an intellegent and informed discussion for once. One of the ways to help everyone be informed is if I inform you.
Well, I think there are other threads like this, but I'm going to make this one anyways. We all have our opinions on sex, and how soon or often. I personally am very conservative in this regard, seeing all the potential STD's out there and how rampant it sees to be. However, I just found some things that have validated my views and opinions on teen sex and such, take a look at these articles. I'll summarize them, but it will be broad and you guys are still expected to read the articles before you can join the conversation.
Yes, well, I have read the articles you linked to and I'll start by saying that I agree that preaching abstinence to teens is a good thing. However, it's not the ultimate solution to preventing teen pregnancy and STD's. It is merely one of the tools in combating those things. I make that point because many people who advocate teaching abstinence in school are also against any form of birth control education. And what those people fail to understand is that while taking an abstinent pledge may keep some teens from having premarital sex, there will still be many other teens who choose to have sex anyway. And what about them? Should they not be educated about birth control as well as methods of practicing safe sex? I think they should be. But there are many conservatives who can't acknowledge that abstinent pledges do sometimes fail for some teens. But those conservatives all too frequently equate birth control and safe sex practices with promiscuity. This makes their approach to teen sex too ideological and I think they fail to take into consideration human behavior as well as a teenager's hormones.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Sex apparently is going down! Teens today are practicing abstinence more than those of the 90's. What this means is that for all of us who are abstinent there are more and more of us around, even if they don't admit it.
I'm willing to bet you can find more than one source of information that conflicts with this data. It really depends on where in the United States (assuming we're keeping this focus on the U.S.) you care to look at. Some areas have higher teen sex rates, others don't.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Teens that don't engage in premarital sex are %100 more likely to not get a girl pregnant before marriage
Obviously. I mean, experts haven't proven yet that women can get pregnant through osmosis.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
%100 less likely to get an STD.
If for a fact that each person in the relationship had never had sex. But you're never 100 percent positive about your companion so I kind of laugh at that statistic.,
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Kids that wait till they get married are more likely to have a stronger relationship a more loving one, and be in better shape to have a baby that doesn't become a juvenile or loser.
You should be very careful with your wording. You are saying "Kids that wait till they get married..." Kids, Carloseus. The reason I scrutinize your wording on that is because I live in a state where it is common for couples no older than 18 to get married. In my opinion, most of those 18 year olds are still kids; not ready for marriage. They get married so quickly because they are so horny that they cannot wait very long to have sex. So they marry in order to have sex without the guilt. Obviously I'm not trying to say that none of those couples have ever loved each other, but sometimes they actually do get their lust for one another confused with love. And many marriages built on lust can quickly deteriorate. I know a girl personally who was married at 18 and divorced at 19. It had turned out her and her husband had nothing in common after all and they realized they didn't love each other. In retrospect, they can acknowledge to a point that they were just so horny for each other.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
My opinions are that abstinence is the way to go, STD's suck, and a GIGANTIC majority of ways to get an STD is go have sex with multiple people,
Yes, I agree that STD's suck and that sleeping with multiple partners will definitely increase one's chance to contract an STD. And if you yourself are abstinent until marriage, and so is your future wife, then you two won't have STD's. But teaching abstinence to teens is only part of how one should approach this problem.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
which happens alot if you have premarital sex.
Shockingly enough, infidelity rates are much higher than you may think. It is difficult to obtain data on infidelity because most people wish to keep that sort of thing private. But did you know that currently in the U.S., 1/0 children in families think the person who is their father is not actually their father? That means that roughly ten percent of all children in the U.S. were conceived out of an adulterous affair. This is a pretty crazy statistic, but further research is being conducted on infidelity that is revealing just how common it is for even married people to have more than one sexual partner. Still not as much as those who are unmarried, but don't think that married people are so infallible.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
And all if not most guys can agree with me, we don't want to marry a girl that has had a ton of guys in her before. Don't mean to be so blunt, but thats just the way it is.
Unfortunately for you, you may one day fall in love with a girl who has had sex with several other guys in the past. And you may even love her so much that you do not care how many partners she has had in the past. All that will matter to you is that you love her and she loves you. But I admire your idealism nonetheless.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
I would prefer to marry a virgin girl, instead of a slut.
Ouch! You're implying here that if a girl is not a virgin and not married, then she could only be a slut.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Girls as far as I've been told do as well. And the reason for this, is because virgin=good, slut=bad.
You might want to try harder to justify these sweeping generalizations you are making.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
There are those of you that will bash me for what I'm saying, but I don't think that I'm saying something that you don't feel.
Well you're right about one thing: there are indeed those of us that will bash you for what you're saying.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Of course there will be those of you who are unsalvageable, but whether you are or not is decided by this question: "Do you want your daughter to be the school slut?"
So if I disagree with you, that makes me unsalvageable? Look, I definitely wouldn't want my daughter to be a school slut, or any kind of slut for that matter. But a couple of things. First, if my daughter did have premarital sex, what kind of father would I be to think of her as a slut? That's pretty extreme. Second, I would do everything I could to educate my daughter and teach her that she doesn't need to have sex in order to validate herself. I would want to convey to her the serious consequences of getting pregnant or getting an STD. I would want to tell her that she shouldn't take her childhood for granted and not be in such a hurry to become an adult. But if in the end, if I failed, and she ended up having sex anyway, I would still not think of her as a sllut.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
I'll say some more and open up to the forum, but do you guys agree or disagree? Should teens be more active sexually, or should they wait for marriage or at least after-high school?
I can't imagine that anyone actually thinks that teens should be more sexually active. I certainly don't think they should be. It's not like we're harnessing their sexual energies to power cities all across America. But I also don't believe that those Abstinence Pledges, which is what the articles are about, is the best way to keep teens from having sex. I wouldn't have a problem with advocates of teaching abstinence if they weren't also against teaching about birth control and safe sex.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
marriage is the way to go.
Maybe for you. But marriage still scares the hell out of me and I'm still too way immature to get married.
Yes, well, I have read the articles you linked to and I'll start by saying that I agree that preaching abstinence to teens is a good thing. However, it's not the ultimate solution to preventing teen pregnancy and STD's. It is merely one of the tools in combating those things. I make that point because many people who advocate teaching abstinence in school are also against any form of birth control education. And what those people fail to understand is that while taking an abstinent pledge may keep some teens from having premarital sex, there will still be many other teens who choose to have sex anyway. And what about them? Should they not be educated about birth control as well as methods of practicing safe sex? I think they should be. But there are many conservatives who can't acknowledge that abstinent pledges do sometimes fail for some teens. But those conservatives all too frequently equate birth control and safe sex practices with promiscuity. This makes their approach to teen sex too ideological and I think they fail to take into consideration human behavior as well as a teenager's hormones.
I myself am an opponent to the extreme and religious, often being the right in politics. I am in no way religious, I answer to only one person. Thats me. But as for teaching people safe sex and the consequences sex may bring in all sides of the spectrum, its exactly what we should do! Teaching kids about the bad side to having sex is also what helps them keep on the track of abstinence.
I'm conservative, but not extremist. Just like everyone, I'm flexible. If I have a shot at Jessica Alba, I'm taking it, not only for me but for all of us. So if I came accross as "I'm higher than that" or something of the like I apologize.
I'm willing to bet you can find more than one source of information that conflicts with this data. It really depends on where in the United States (assuming we're keeping this focus on the U.S.) you care to look at. Some areas have higher teen sex rates, others don't.
You may have missed it, but this is where I base that statement on
According to the centers for disease control, the percentage of US high school students having sex fell from 54-percent to 46-percent
I think its a viable source of information.
Obviously. I mean, experts haven't proven yet that women can get pregnant through osmosis.
If for a fact that each person in the relationship had never had sex. But you're never 100 percent positive about your companion so I kind of laugh at that statistic.,
If teens as a mass stop or refuse to have sex until marriage, then it would be a great statistic. I of course made it myself, but your chances do increase dramatically if you are abstinent in the first place, and if your partner is also abstinent you have 0-1% chance of getting an STD or empregnating a woman before marriage.
You should be very careful with your wording. You are saying "Kids that wait till they get married..." Kids, Carloseus. The reason I scrutinize your wording on that is because I live in a state where it is common for couples no older than 18 to get married. In my opinion, most of those 18 year olds are still kids; not ready for marriage. They get married so quickly because they are so horny that they cannot wait very long to have sex. So they marry in order to have sex without the guilt. Obviously I'm not trying to say that none of those couples have ever loved each other, but sometimes they actually do get their lust for one another confused with love. And many marriages built on lust can quickly deteriorate. I know a girl personally who was married at 18 and divorced at 19. It had turned out her and her husband had nothing in common after all and they realized they didn't love each other. In retrospect, they can acknowledge to a point that they were just so horny for each other.
I agree. I'm not ready for marriage, and I'm 17. However, I think I'm ready for a relationship whom with I can someday have a marriage. I plan on marrying around 25, granted I have a solid base with someone to marry with. A relationship built on affection and love will last and be true. You don't need sex for that. It's in a way innocent and awesome! But since guys are convinced to get laid and to practice that animalistic side of them, they often fail to know what that feels like.
Now I'm not a pussy either, but if you can't go a year without having sex, are you mature enough to have a marriage? At 17-20 a person is still maturing, and up to 25 they are still learning and getting used to the changes they have gone through. Decisions about marriage and kids shouldn't be made until then at least, because out of high school its too confusing.
Yes, I agree that STD's suck and that sleeping with multiple partners will definitely increase one's chance to contract an STD. And if you yourself are abstinent until marriage, and so is your future wife, then you two won't have STD's. But teaching abstinence to teens is only part of how one should approach this problem.
Hence I provide a website of information for people to learn more about sex, not to mention this great forum where individuals such as yourself and I can provide a wealth of information and well-formed opinions to share for those that are wanting to learn more.
Shockingly enough, infidelity rates are much higher than you may think. It is difficult to obtain data on infidelity because most people wish to keep that sort of thing private. But did you know that currently in the U.S., 1/0 children in families think the person who is their father is not actually their father? That means that roughly ten percent of all children in the U.S. were conceived out of an adulterous affair. This is a pretty crazy statistic, but further research is being conducted on infidelity that is revealing just how common it is for even married people to have more than one sexual partner. Still not as much as those who are unmarried, but don't think that married people are so infallible.
In one of the statistics, it reveals that people that have partners before marriage find marriage to be more of a drag. Those who haven't had partners find marriage to be more enjoyable. As for infidelity, your probably right.
Unfortunately for you, you may one day fall in love with a girl who has had sex with several other guys in the past. And you may even love her so much that you do not care how many partners she has had in the past. All that will matter to you is that you love her and she loves you. But I admire your idealism nonetheless.
Probably, but all the same, I believe that the woman a man is with is a reflection of his values. For instance, a man who sets high standards for his wife is more likely to find one with good values, maybe not perfect to his, but good enough to the point where he loves her enough to marry her. Marriage I hate to say is a bit like picking members for a sports team. You want the best qualifying players on your side to make the best team possible.
Ouch! You're implying here that if a girl is not a virgin and not married, then she could only be a slut.
I'm making a point by using two extremes. Of course there is grey areas and every case is diferent. I was just making a point, either a completely clean shirt, or a worn and dirty one?
You might want to try harder to justify these sweeping generalizations you are making.
Well thats for all that I posted and the articles to explain. I can only back up info so much before I give it out.
Well you're right about one thing: there are indeed those of us that will bash you for what you're saying.
What part of what i say are you bashing?
So if I disagree with you, that makes me unsalvageable? Look, I definitely wouldn't want my daughter to be a school slut, or any kind of slut for that matter. But a couple of things. First, if my daughter did have premarital sex, what kind of father would I be to think of her as a slut? That's pretty extreme. Second, I would do everything I could to educate my daughter and teach her that she doesn't need to have sex in order to validate herself. I would want to convey to her the serious consequences of getting pregnant or getting an STD. I would want to tell her that she shouldn't take her childhood for granted and not be in such a hurry to become an adult. But if in the end, if I failed, and she ended up having sex anyway, I would still not think of her as a sllut.
Hold on. If you disagree with me its your thing, but that was meant for men like Tom Lykis, who only believes in hit-it-and-quit-it sort of things. As for a daughter, the answer was straight up. Would you or would you not want her to be the school slut? Whether she is or isn't is not the question. Now the way to approach it to her is how you just did, teach her the importance of it, and what it can do. That she doesn't need to do it for others to like her. If she does have sex, you need to be flexible and be there for her, because she probably already beat herself down if she's telling you. However if you teach her the importance of abstinence and the reprecussions of sex, then its more likely that she won't be a slut. If my daughter had sex before marriage I wouldn't think her a slut either, just stupid and I should better explain to her what happens when things go wrong. A parent should always be a pillar of support, and that would be a better opportunity for you to better explain and teach so that she doesn't do it anymore.
I can't imagine that anyone actually thinks that teens should be more sexually active. I certainly don't think they should be. It's not like we're harnessing their sexual energies to power cities all across America. But I also don't believe that those Abstinence Pledges, which is what the articles are about, is the best way to keep teens from having sex. I wouldn't have a problem with advocates of teaching abstinence if they weren't also against teaching about birth control and safe sex.
Glad you agree with my views on sexually active teens. But maybe things have changed since you were in school, because when I was a freshman I had the mandatory sex-ed at school. After the week-long classes of sex-ed, the teacher tried to get people to make the pledge, and they took it! Well some of them anyways. But the course was full of information on safe sex and birth control as well as diseases and the statistics of people that never finish high school or stay poor the rest of their lives because they didn't practice safe sex. And with the abstinence pledges, he informed everyone about how much better one's chances were if they got married before sex.
Maybe for you. But marriage still scares the hell out of me and I'm still too way immature to get married.
Well your honest enough to admit that you aren't ready for marriage. I know I'm not, but I want to be ready for marriage and family by 30 at the most. I want to have a career and stability as well as a house and a car by the time I have a kid, I just want for my kids I had and more. Granted my dad couldn't provide some things, but I at least had a house and a good childhood growing up, maybe not the most time with him since he worked alot, but I love him for the sacrifices he made. He was 20 when I was born, and my mom 17. They married about 7-8 years after my birth, but they never even once abandoned one another. I'd like to think that if they can do it, I certainly can, but I won't. My knowledge and english and experience of this country and everything for that matter is way higher above their's when they were young. But i know that if I had to step up to the plate like my dad did, I certainly can.
I myself am an opponent to the extreme and religious, often being the right in politics. I am in no way religious, I answer to only one person. Thats me. But as for teaching people safe sex and the consequences sex may bring in all sides of the spectrum, its exactly what we should do! Teaching kids about the bad side to having sex is also what helps them keep on the track of abstinence.
I suppose what I'm saying about the majority of absitence advocates then is that you should be wary of them. Because the ones that actually lobby to their boards of education wish only for abstinence to be taught, but not in stride with safe sex practices.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
If I have a shot at Jessica Alba, I'm taking it, not only for me but for all of us.
You and me both, brotha.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
So if I came accross as "I'm higher than that" or something of the like I apologize.
You didn't necessarily. But you do speak of some of these things as if they were black and white when they're not. And I think your use of the word slut discredits you in some places.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
You may have missed it, but this is where I base that statement on
I think its a viable source of information.
But what I'm saying is that it might not really mean that teen sex is going down, but as sex education goes up, teen pregnancy and STD's go down. In other words, I think the data might be manipulated to project that teens are having less sex when in fact they may be having just as much sex, but it is of the contraceptive kind.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
If teens as a mass stop or refuse to have sex until marriage, then it would be a great statistic. I of course made it myself, but your chances do increase dramatically if you are abstinent in the first place, and if your partner is also abstinent you have 0-1% chance of getting an STD or empregnating a woman before marriage.
I wasn't disagreeing with you on this. It just seemed as obvious as stating that murdering a person will result in that person's death.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
I agree. I'm not ready for marriage, and I'm 17. However, I think I'm ready for a relationship whom with I can someday have a marriage. I plan on marrying around 25, granted I have a solid base with someone to marry with. A relationship built on affection and love will last and be true. You don't need sex for that. It's in a way innocent and awesome! But since guys are convinced to get laid and to practice that animalistic side of them, they often fail to know what that feels like.
I'd like to thing there is an ideal age at which I would get married. But I don't think anyone is ever completely ready. And that's okay. One should go into it with some sense of adventure. But just cause no one is completely prepared going in, that doesn't mean they should still be somewhat prepared for what they're getting into.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Now I'm not a pussy either, but if you can't go a year without having sex, are you mature enough to have a marriage? At 17-20 a person is still maturing, and up to 25 they are still learning and getting used to the changes they have gone through.
For the most part yeah, but stages of development vary for each individual. In fairness, I have known people at the age of 20 who were in fact mature enough to make a marriage work. But most still are not as mature.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Decisions about marriage and kids shouldn't be made until then at least, because out of high school its too confusing.
The decision about kids isn't always a decision for some people. Even many married couples conceive children unintentionally.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Hence I provide a website of information for people to learn more about sex, not to mention this great forum where individuals such as yourself and I can provide a wealth of information and well-formed opinions to share for those that are wanting to learn more.
I'll do my best to share my opinion. But I'm definitely not here to educate people about sex. But at any rate, I respect your concern toward this matter. Soon you'll be voting in elections and everything.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
In one of the statistics, it reveals that people that have partners before marriage find marriage to be more of a drag. Those who haven't had partners find marriage to be more enjoyable.
This could also vary depending on the couple. Different people get married for different reasons. Some for the wrong reasons. Sometimes those wrong reasons can lead to regret and that regret can lead to infidelity.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Probably, but all the same, I believe that the woman a man is with is a reflection of his values. For instance, a man who sets high standards for his wife is more likely to find one with good values, maybe not perfect to his, but good enough to the point where he loves her enough to marry her.
I can agree to this to a point. But the point I'm trying to make is your future wife may have slept with numerous guys in the past; may have even been a full-blown whore. But is it not possible that she could have left that kind of life behind and cares about different things by the time you met her? The same kinds of things that you also care about? Or do you believe once a slut, always a slut?
Quote from "Carloseus" »
I'm making a point by using two extremes. Of course there is grey areas and every case is diferent. I was just making a point, either a completely clean shirt, or a worn and dirty one?
Well that's just the problem with your clean shirt/dirty shirt analogy. You acknowledge that there are grey areas. So why even use the black and white extremes to demonstrate your point?
Quote from "Carloseus" »
What part of what i say are you bashing?
I'm not really bashing anything you say. I was just agreeing with you that someone will probably come along and outrightly bash what you've said.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Hold on. If you disagree with me its your thing, but that was meant for men like Tom Lykis, who only believes in hit-it-and-quit-it sort of things. As for a daughter, the answer was straight up. Would you or would you not want her to be the school slut?
Obviously I wouldn't want my daughter to be the school slut? Who would want that? But I don't even see what the point of your question is. When you really think about it, the question of whether someone would want that for their daughter or not has nothing to do with this whole argument. You just seem to be equating pre-marital sex with slutiness. And I don't think those two things are synonymous with each other.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Whether she is or isn't is not the question. Now the way to approach it to her is how you just did, teach her the importance of it, and what it can do. That she doesn't need to do it for others to like her. If she does have sex, you need to be flexible and be there for her, because she probably already beat herself down if she's telling you. However if you teach her the importance of abstinence and the reprecussions of sex, then its more likely that she won't be a slut. If my daughter had sex before marriage I wouldn't think her a slut either, just stupid and I should better explain to her what happens when things go wrong. A parent should always be a pillar of support, and that would be a better opportunity for you to better explain and teach so that she doesn't do it anymore.
I think I kind of understand the point you're making here now. But it's like you went from arguing why a teen shouldn't have sex to how a parent could talk to their kids about sex. And we seem to agree with each other about how a parent should discuss it with their kids. But I guess I don't see how this is supporting your thesis regarding teen sex.
Quote from "Carloseus" »
Glad you agree with my views on sexually active teens. But maybe things have changed since you were in school, because when I was a freshman I had the mandatory sex-ed at school. After the week-long classes of sex-ed, the teacher tried to get people to make the pledge, and they took it! Well some of them anyways. But the course was full of information on safe sex and birth control as well as diseases and the statistics of people that never finish high school or stay poor the rest of their lives because they didn't practice safe sex. And with the abstinence pledges, he informed everyone about how much better one's chances were if they got married before sex.
Luckily as it stands now, most schools teach abstinence as well as birth control and safe sex practices. But what disturbs me is the relentless lobbying by conservatives to have sex education taken out of schools and have it all replaced with just teaching abstinence.
Man this is a weird topic. All i can say is, im against having sex for no reason, but if theres a good enough reason to do it then why make yourself wait. I know plenty of my mates who have girl/boyfriends and they have sex for no other reason than they are ready and they are in love. And, they want to. No problem with that.
And i mean, theres always your first. Its usually pointless and alcohol-fueled but its an experience and part of life.
I really dont think its a case of "premartial sex is the way to go" or "abstinence is the way to go". Its more a case of if your doing it for the right reasons, go ahead. So i wont be voting.
nah im talking at parties here very often drunk people just hook up and one thing leads to another. its very common. they just do it to 'score' and soforth.
Doesn't sex lasts for five minutes or something ? You guys are making it sound like a divine thing. Anyway back to the topic, I'm no expert but I'm sure teens having sex is not really a good thing and I don't approve it. But heh, who the hell am I to stop two stupid kids for having sex ?
Carloseus, let me know if I'm allow to vote, I really don't count.
ha anyway im pretty sure carlo jus cant score a girl and hes using abstinence as an excuse.
i say do what ever you want but make sure shes on the pill and if she says no that means no
Did you read the article at all? This is what I mean by people blindlingly bashing. You don't think, you just act on your hormones, your a slave to your animalistic desires. If you haven't noticed, ANYONE can get laid these days. It's harder to stay a virgin than getting laid. So no, its not because I can't find a whore that will sleep with anyone, because there are tons of those.
And sex doesn't just last for 5 min hndW, what it is for humans is not only a courtship to further the survival of the species, but its an intimate action between two people. Two people showing affection to one another. Thinking about it as just a good time and I'll never see that bitch again is wrong in my book. That reasoning, which Hardcore has, is having no respect to the intimacy of love. Instead its avoiding it altogether and seeking a quick feel-good, like a drug. But all it will do is make you want it more, and you will never get enough of it, therefore you will never be truly happy. At least thats how I see it.
I may have some very opinionated views, but thats just me. I'm a big conservative, but I don't identify with many others that call themselves the same, mostly because those others are too radical or not enough. I hope you guys can actually read and take time to think over a response before posting, because so far there are already idiots posting without knowing what the hell is going on, or not caring for the rest of what this conversations is about.
I'll just say that I'm not having sex with anyone until they give me a big serious document from a ginecologist confirming that they are clean of anything they can possibly be clean of (and a true guy will give me that)... I'm not 18 yet anyway... now I'll go read the articles, nice thread btw.
But I'm not into the whole "no sex until babies" thing, that's religios crap for me.
No, I'm ok with moderation. But I'm just trying to make a point. If you aren't told the white and black, how are you supposed to know what the extremes are? Just like good and evil, you need the most extreme evil and most extreme good to know which side your actions or beliefs lean more to. We aren't all white or black, we are different shades of grey.
I respect others that think like Ferret, and don't mind what they do. He is safe and has mutual respect for the other person involved. My distaste goes to those that just treat sex like a drug.
You don't need to be told white or black at all, in fact, those concepts often cloud judgement instead of making it broader. There is a problem, and you look at it, and you have your opinion about it, no need to look at the extremeties at all. I follow the gray only.
I hate men who chase after sex. I heard the regular excuse that they can't help it, but I'm really not sure if that is even true.
ive fucked 6 girls without condoms, no stds (got tested) and I have way more fun than you people with "morals".
However abstience is a stupid thing for schools to teach, as kids will have sex just as they will drink and do drugs. Fact of the matter is they should teach safe sex methhods while promoting abstinence(like my school did). Sex really isnt all that special so go get drunk and have some fun
You are still lucky. A lot of people get lucky like that but then one day you find out you got herpes and you wonder who the heck you got it from.
And, fucking without condoms is a lousy and cabel thing to do because you can get her pregnant... but you don't care, do you? You are just a guy.
They can help it, there are lots of us who do. Those who "cant help it" only do so because they choose to not help it. Like I might have said before, they give in to the animalistic instincts they have and are slaves to it. It involves more willpower and better judgement, but as anything its not all black and white. There are plenty of good guys out there that will wait, I imagine Ferret as one of those. Though its important to him, he isn't going to booze you up and bang you. At least, thats what I get from him. He is mindful of the situation and all the other things that are going on.
But as for chasing after sex, thats more of a mindless and stupid nature that less educated and less morally strong men do. A good example that comes to mind is the movie "Booty Call". If some of you haven't seen it, go see it and there is the epitomy of what man shouldn't be like. One is persistent and can't wait to get her pants off, while the other one is awquard and whatever. But both are in a competition as to who will get laid first.
And to Frigid, thats what I've been saying all along. They are teaching safe sex and promoting abstinence. Doing it the other way around doesn't do much good. And as Equinox said, you are damn lucky that you don't have an STD or a woman with a baby at her breast beating at your door. Jesus christ dude.
sex is sex its awsum but only do it with ppl u like and dont worry about shit
make sure to wear protection
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
We gotta make a change...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive. Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin) ~~us West Ladder~~
ive fucked 6 girls without condoms, no stds (got tested) and I have way more fun than you people with "morals".
However abstience is a stupid thing for schools to teach, as kids will have sex just as they will drink and do drugs. Fact of the matter is they should teach safe sex methhods while promoting abstinence(like my school did). Sex really isnt all that special so go get drunk and have some fun
hell yeah bro thats what i like to hear none of this " oh i cant get a girl so im abstinent" all you need in life r three things beer bitches and money. apparently u have beer from ur avatar and bitches from 6 and if u got money ur set!
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
DIABLO = DEVIL its not supposed to be a nice game autostats are rediclous lack of pots is not welcome if it aint broke dont fix it! (diablo2)
hell yeah bro thats what i like to hear none of this " oh i cant get a girl so im abstinent" all you need in life r three things beer bitches and money. apparently u have beer from ur avatar and bitches from 6 and if u got money ur set!
wheres a fast car and a lowered truck at on that list????
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
We gotta make a change...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive. Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin) ~~us West Ladder~~
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Well, I think there are other threads like this, but I'm going to make this one anyways. We all have our opinions on sex, and how soon or often. I personally am very conservative in this regard, seeing all the potential STD's out there and how rampant it sees to be. However, I just found some things that have validated my views and opinions on teen sex and such, take a look at these articles. I'll summarize them, but it will be broad and you guys are still expected to read the articles before you can join the conversation.
Sex apparently is going down! Teens today are practicing abstinence more than those of the 90's. What this means is that for all of us who are abstinent there are more and more of us around, even if they don't admit it. Teens that don't engage in premarital sex are %100 more likely to not get a girl pregnant before marriage, and %100 less likely to get an STD. Kids that wait till they get married are more likely to have a stronger relationship, a more loving one, and be in better shape to have a baby that doesn't become a juvenile or loser.
My opinions are that abstinence is the way to go, STD's suck, and a GIGANTIC majority of ways to get an STD is go have sex with multiple people, which happens alot if you have premarital sex. And all if not most guys can agree with me, we don't want to marry a girl that has had a ton of guys in her before. Don't mean to be so blunt, but thats just the way it is. I would prefer to marry a virgin girl, instead of a slut. Girls as far as I've been told do as well. And the reason for this, is because virgin=good, slut=bad.
There are those of you that will bash me for what I'm saying, but I don't think that I'm saying something that you don't feel. Of course there will be those of you who are unsalvageable, but whether you are or not is decided by this question: "Do you want your daughter to be the school slut?"
I'll say some more and open up to the forum, but do you guys agree or disagree? Should teens be more active sexually, or should they wait for marriage or at least after-high school? I honestly believe, and I practice what I preech, that at least till after high school, but marriage is the way to go.
http://www.projectpledge.org/pages/article1.php
http://www.projectpledge.org/pages/article2.php
http://www.projectpledge.org/pages/article3.php
http://www.projectpledge.org/pages/article4.php
There are the articles I read, read these before you answer the poll. I know its alot to read, but I would like an intellegent and informed discussion for once. One of the ways to help everyone be informed is if I inform you.
I'm willing to bet you can find more than one source of information that conflicts with this data. It really depends on where in the United States (assuming we're keeping this focus on the U.S.) you care to look at. Some areas have higher teen sex rates, others don't.
Obviously. I mean, experts haven't proven yet that women can get pregnant through osmosis.
If for a fact that each person in the relationship had never had sex. But you're never 100 percent positive about your companion so I kind of laugh at that statistic.,
You should be very careful with your wording. You are saying "Kids that wait till they get married..." Kids, Carloseus. The reason I scrutinize your wording on that is because I live in a state where it is common for couples no older than 18 to get married. In my opinion, most of those 18 year olds are still kids; not ready for marriage. They get married so quickly because they are so horny that they cannot wait very long to have sex. So they marry in order to have sex without the guilt. Obviously I'm not trying to say that none of those couples have ever loved each other, but sometimes they actually do get their lust for one another confused with love. And many marriages built on lust can quickly deteriorate. I know a girl personally who was married at 18 and divorced at 19. It had turned out her and her husband had nothing in common after all and they realized they didn't love each other. In retrospect, they can acknowledge to a point that they were just so horny for each other.
Yes, I agree that STD's suck and that sleeping with multiple partners will definitely increase one's chance to contract an STD. And if you yourself are abstinent until marriage, and so is your future wife, then you two won't have STD's. But teaching abstinence to teens is only part of how one should approach this problem.
Shockingly enough, infidelity rates are much higher than you may think. It is difficult to obtain data on infidelity because most people wish to keep that sort of thing private. But did you know that currently in the U.S., 1/0 children in families think the person who is their father is not actually their father? That means that roughly ten percent of all children in the U.S. were conceived out of an adulterous affair. This is a pretty crazy statistic, but further research is being conducted on infidelity that is revealing just how common it is for even married people to have more than one sexual partner. Still not as much as those who are unmarried, but don't think that married people are so infallible.
Unfortunately for you, you may one day fall in love with a girl who has had sex with several other guys in the past. And you may even love her so much that you do not care how many partners she has had in the past. All that will matter to you is that you love her and she loves you. But I admire your idealism nonetheless.
Ouch! You're implying here that if a girl is not a virgin and not married, then she could only be a slut.
You might want to try harder to justify these sweeping generalizations you are making.
Well you're right about one thing: there are indeed those of us that will bash you for what you're saying.
So if I disagree with you, that makes me unsalvageable? Look, I definitely wouldn't want my daughter to be a school slut, or any kind of slut for that matter. But a couple of things. First, if my daughter did have premarital sex, what kind of father would I be to think of her as a slut? That's pretty extreme. Second, I would do everything I could to educate my daughter and teach her that she doesn't need to have sex in order to validate herself. I would want to convey to her the serious consequences of getting pregnant or getting an STD. I would want to tell her that she shouldn't take her childhood for granted and not be in such a hurry to become an adult. But if in the end, if I failed, and she ended up having sex anyway, I would still not think of her as a sllut.
I can't imagine that anyone actually thinks that teens should be more sexually active. I certainly don't think they should be. It's not like we're harnessing their sexual energies to power cities all across America. But I also don't believe that those Abstinence Pledges, which is what the articles are about, is the best way to keep teens from having sex. I wouldn't have a problem with advocates of teaching abstinence if they weren't also against teaching about birth control and safe sex.
Maybe for you. But marriage still scares the hell out of me and I'm still too way immature to get married.
Siaynoq's Playthroughs
I myself am an opponent to the extreme and religious, often being the right in politics. I am in no way religious, I answer to only one person. Thats me. But as for teaching people safe sex and the consequences sex may bring in all sides of the spectrum, its exactly what we should do! Teaching kids about the bad side to having sex is also what helps them keep on the track of abstinence.
I'm conservative, but not extremist. Just like everyone, I'm flexible. If I have a shot at Jessica Alba, I'm taking it, not only for me but for all of us. So if I came accross as "I'm higher than that" or something of the like I apologize.
You may have missed it, but this is where I base that statement on
I think its a viable source of information.
If teens as a mass stop or refuse to have sex until marriage, then it would be a great statistic. I of course made it myself, but your chances do increase dramatically if you are abstinent in the first place, and if your partner is also abstinent you have 0-1% chance of getting an STD or empregnating a woman before marriage.
I agree. I'm not ready for marriage, and I'm 17. However, I think I'm ready for a relationship whom with I can someday have a marriage. I plan on marrying around 25, granted I have a solid base with someone to marry with. A relationship built on affection and love will last and be true. You don't need sex for that. It's in a way innocent and awesome! But since guys are convinced to get laid and to practice that animalistic side of them, they often fail to know what that feels like.
Now I'm not a pussy either, but if you can't go a year without having sex, are you mature enough to have a marriage? At 17-20 a person is still maturing, and up to 25 they are still learning and getting used to the changes they have gone through. Decisions about marriage and kids shouldn't be made until then at least, because out of high school its too confusing.
Hence I provide a website of information for people to learn more about sex, not to mention this great forum where individuals such as yourself and I can provide a wealth of information and well-formed opinions to share for those that are wanting to learn more.
In one of the statistics, it reveals that people that have partners before marriage find marriage to be more of a drag. Those who haven't had partners find marriage to be more enjoyable. As for infidelity, your probably right.
Probably, but all the same, I believe that the woman a man is with is a reflection of his values. For instance, a man who sets high standards for his wife is more likely to find one with good values, maybe not perfect to his, but good enough to the point where he loves her enough to marry her. Marriage I hate to say is a bit like picking members for a sports team. You want the best qualifying players on your side to make the best team possible.
I'm making a point by using two extremes. Of course there is grey areas and every case is diferent. I was just making a point, either a completely clean shirt, or a worn and dirty one?
Well thats for all that I posted and the articles to explain. I can only back up info so much before I give it out.
What part of what i say are you bashing?
Hold on. If you disagree with me its your thing, but that was meant for men like Tom Lykis, who only believes in hit-it-and-quit-it sort of things. As for a daughter, the answer was straight up. Would you or would you not want her to be the school slut? Whether she is or isn't is not the question. Now the way to approach it to her is how you just did, teach her the importance of it, and what it can do. That she doesn't need to do it for others to like her. If she does have sex, you need to be flexible and be there for her, because she probably already beat herself down if she's telling you. However if you teach her the importance of abstinence and the reprecussions of sex, then its more likely that she won't be a slut. If my daughter had sex before marriage I wouldn't think her a slut either, just stupid and I should better explain to her what happens when things go wrong. A parent should always be a pillar of support, and that would be a better opportunity for you to better explain and teach so that she doesn't do it anymore.
Glad you agree with my views on sexually active teens. But maybe things have changed since you were in school, because when I was a freshman I had the mandatory sex-ed at school. After the week-long classes of sex-ed, the teacher tried to get people to make the pledge, and they took it! Well some of them anyways. But the course was full of information on safe sex and birth control as well as diseases and the statistics of people that never finish high school or stay poor the rest of their lives because they didn't practice safe sex. And with the abstinence pledges, he informed everyone about how much better one's chances were if they got married before sex.
Well your honest enough to admit that you aren't ready for marriage. I know I'm not, but I want to be ready for marriage and family by 30 at the most. I want to have a career and stability as well as a house and a car by the time I have a kid, I just want for my kids I had and more. Granted my dad couldn't provide some things, but I at least had a house and a good childhood growing up, maybe not the most time with him since he worked alot, but I love him for the sacrifices he made. He was 20 when I was born, and my mom 17. They married about 7-8 years after my birth, but they never even once abandoned one another. I'd like to think that if they can do it, I certainly can, but I won't. My knowledge and english and experience of this country and everything for that matter is way higher above their's when they were young. But i know that if I had to step up to the plate like my dad did, I certainly can.
You and me both, brotha.
You didn't necessarily. But you do speak of some of these things as if they were black and white when they're not. And I think your use of the word slut discredits you in some places.
But what I'm saying is that it might not really mean that teen sex is going down, but as sex education goes up, teen pregnancy and STD's go down. In other words, I think the data might be manipulated to project that teens are having less sex when in fact they may be having just as much sex, but it is of the contraceptive kind.
I wasn't disagreeing with you on this. It just seemed as obvious as stating that murdering a person will result in that person's death.
I'd like to thing there is an ideal age at which I would get married. But I don't think anyone is ever completely ready. And that's okay. One should go into it with some sense of adventure. But just cause no one is completely prepared going in, that doesn't mean they should still be somewhat prepared for what they're getting into.
For the most part yeah, but stages of development vary for each individual. In fairness, I have known people at the age of 20 who were in fact mature enough to make a marriage work. But most still are not as mature.
The decision about kids isn't always a decision for some people. Even many married couples conceive children unintentionally.
I'll do my best to share my opinion. But I'm definitely not here to educate people about sex. But at any rate, I respect your concern toward this matter. Soon you'll be voting in elections and everything.
This could also vary depending on the couple. Different people get married for different reasons. Some for the wrong reasons. Sometimes those wrong reasons can lead to regret and that regret can lead to infidelity.
I can agree to this to a point. But the point I'm trying to make is your future wife may have slept with numerous guys in the past; may have even been a full-blown whore. But is it not possible that she could have left that kind of life behind and cares about different things by the time you met her? The same kinds of things that you also care about? Or do you believe once a slut, always a slut?
Well that's just the problem with your clean shirt/dirty shirt analogy. You acknowledge that there are grey areas. So why even use the black and white extremes to demonstrate your point?
I'm not really bashing anything you say. I was just agreeing with you that someone will probably come along and outrightly bash what you've said.
Obviously I wouldn't want my daughter to be the school slut? Who would want that? But I don't even see what the point of your question is. When you really think about it, the question of whether someone would want that for their daughter or not has nothing to do with this whole argument. You just seem to be equating pre-marital sex with slutiness. And I don't think those two things are synonymous with each other.
I think I kind of understand the point you're making here now. But it's like you went from arguing why a teen shouldn't have sex to how a parent could talk to their kids about sex. And we seem to agree with each other about how a parent should discuss it with their kids. But I guess I don't see how this is supporting your thesis regarding teen sex.
Luckily as it stands now, most schools teach abstinence as well as birth control and safe sex practices. But what disturbs me is the relentless lobbying by conservatives to have sex education taken out of schools and have it all replaced with just teaching abstinence.
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And i mean, theres always your first. Its usually pointless and alcohol-fueled but its an experience and part of life.
I really dont think its a case of "premartial sex is the way to go" or "abstinence is the way to go". Its more a case of if your doing it for the right reasons, go ahead. So i wont be voting.
Agreed.
As long as its for a reason.
Carloseus, let me know if I'm allow to vote, I really don't count.
ha anyway im pretty sure carlo jus cant score a girl and hes using abstinence as an excuse.
i say do what ever you want but make sure shes on the pill and if she says no that means no
its not supposed to be a nice game
autostats are rediclous
lack of pots is not welcome
if it aint broke dont fix it! (diablo2)
Did you read the article at all? This is what I mean by people blindlingly bashing. You don't think, you just act on your hormones, your a slave to your animalistic desires. If you haven't noticed, ANYONE can get laid these days. It's harder to stay a virgin than getting laid. So no, its not because I can't find a whore that will sleep with anyone, because there are tons of those.
And sex doesn't just last for 5 min hndW, what it is for humans is not only a courtship to further the survival of the species, but its an intimate action between two people. Two people showing affection to one another. Thinking about it as just a good time and I'll never see that bitch again is wrong in my book. That reasoning, which Hardcore has, is having no respect to the intimacy of love. Instead its avoiding it altogether and seeking a quick feel-good, like a drug. But all it will do is make you want it more, and you will never get enough of it, therefore you will never be truly happy. At least thats how I see it.
I may have some very opinionated views, but thats just me. I'm a big conservative, but I don't identify with many others that call themselves the same, mostly because those others are too radical or not enough. I hope you guys can actually read and take time to think over a response before posting, because so far there are already idiots posting without knowing what the hell is going on, or not caring for the rest of what this conversations is about.
But I'm not into the whole "no sex until babies" thing, that's religios crap for me.
I respect others that think like Ferret, and don't mind what they do. He is safe and has mutual respect for the other person involved. My distaste goes to those that just treat sex like a drug.
I hate men who chase after sex. I heard the regular excuse that they can't help it, but I'm really not sure if that is even true.
However abstience is a stupid thing for schools to teach, as kids will have sex just as they will drink and do drugs. Fact of the matter is they should teach safe sex methhods while promoting abstinence(like my school did). Sex really isnt all that special so go get drunk and have some fun
And, fucking without condoms is a lousy and cabel thing to do because you can get her pregnant... but you don't care, do you? You are just a guy.
But as for chasing after sex, thats more of a mindless and stupid nature that less educated and less morally strong men do. A good example that comes to mind is the movie "Booty Call". If some of you haven't seen it, go see it and there is the epitomy of what man shouldn't be like. One is persistent and can't wait to get her pants off, while the other one is awquard and whatever. But both are in a competition as to who will get laid first.
And to Frigid, thats what I've been saying all along. They are teaching safe sex and promoting abstinence. Doing it the other way around doesn't do much good. And as Equinox said, you are damn lucky that you don't have an STD or a woman with a baby at her breast beating at your door. Jesus christ dude.
make sure to wear protection
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.
Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners
SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin)
~~us West Ladder~~
hell yeah bro thats what i like to hear none of this " oh i cant get a girl so im abstinent" all you need in life r three things beer bitches and money. apparently u have beer from ur avatar and bitches from 6 and if u got money ur set!
its not supposed to be a nice game
autostats are rediclous
lack of pots is not welcome
if it aint broke dont fix it! (diablo2)
wheres a fast car and a lowered truck at on that list????
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.
Tupac Shakur
100% Legit baal runners
SICK_Bambi 93 Barb (46th barb)
SICK_Paladin 95 Necromancer (12th necro)
SICK_ferret 95 Assassin (10th sin)
~~us West Ladder~~