I am going to write a story that takes place in the land of Sanctuary. It is also for a writing assignment in my English I class at the college. I can write any story I want but the catch is, it must contain the elements that would make it a "Cinderella" Story.
I'm thinking about using Tyrael and Lord Jerhyn as some of the important characters. The main character would be a young girl who is oppressed by her father and has the blood of a sorcerer in her.
Element:_ _ ____ __ ___Character/other (parenthesis mean that I need a suggestion)
"Cinderella": __ __ _ _ _(Young girl, name)
"Fairy Godmother": __ _ Archangel Tyrael
"Prince Charming": ____ Lord Jerhyn "Evil Stepmother": ____ (Step-Father, name) "Snobby Sibling(s)":_ _ _(Step-Sister, name)
"Other helper(s)":_ _ _ _ Atma and Fara
I would like suggestions for names and maybe other ideas if anybody has them.
I posted my story, I will warn you. It is a Wall of Text. Read at your own discretion.
Once upon a time, in the Jeweled City of Lut Gholein, there was a young girl named Cinderella. She was a beautiful girl, daughter to a beautiful Priestess of Zakarum. Her mother died, leaving Cinderella to her cruel step-father and snobby step-sister. She was reduced from a priestess-in-training to a dirty, ragged maid. Forced to labor for her step-father and step-sister, she worked long, hard hours and at the end of each day, she would sleep by the fireplace.
One morning was quite different however. As she was working in her step-father’s pottery shop, she discovered the energy that was slowly blossoming into something great. She had surprisingly healed all her scars from being beaten. She noticed one such scar that was supposed to be on the back of her let hand was missing. “Where… where did it go?” Cinderella gasped, looking at her hand. “What are you muttering on about girl?” demanded her step-father, “Stop fooling around and sweep up the floor.” Cinderella hurried to obey, but in her haste, she tripped over a bucket of water.
As she scrambled to clean the mess, Cinderella’s emotions bubbled forth and the vase her step-father was working on shattered. Cinderella suddenly recoiled as her step-father roared, “Cinderella! Get over here you ungrateful girl, and clean this mess up!” “I’m so sorry,” Cinderella weakly said, “I didn’t mean to. It won’t happen again.” Her step-father slapped her across the head, “Why must you always screw everything up? That vase was for a Lady in Lord Jerhyn’s court.” Cinderella scrambled to clean up the mess she caused. Later that night, as Cinderella curls up near the fireplace to sleep, a holy visitor appeared before her.
“Awaken,” commanded a strong voice. Cinderella woke up and stifled a scream as she saw the being standing before her. “Who… who are you?” “You have no need to fear me, my child.” The magnificent being said, “I am Tyrael. I am here, and as been decided upon at the council, to be the one who will guide you to your destiny.” He wore an astonishing breast plate with the sigil of the Angiris Council emblazoned on it, and a holy blade at his hip which gleamed a glowing white aura, as he himself radiated a golden aura.
Then, it was his face, it beckons, but remains to be seen as he is wearing a hood and, most astonishing of all, he has fiery wings of energy, nothing remotely close to the feathered wings an artisan would portray. “Tomorrow, somebody will come to ask for you. She, and another, is to help you along the way. Lord Jerhyn will be announcing that he is holding a party at the palace, to find a woman who is worthy to marry.” Tyrael then vanishes, leaving a confused and hopeful, Cinderella with many thoughts and questions.
The next morning as Cinderella cleaned the dishes, a knock was heard at the door. “Oh, hello Atma, what a wonderful surprise,” Cinderella heard her step-father say, “What brings you here on a fine day such as this?” “I came to see if I may have Cinderella help clean up my establishment,” Atma replied, “I am willing to pay her some good coin.” Her step-father then calls Cinderella out to go with Atma. Once Cinderella and Atma have gotten out of sight of the house, Atma suddenly steers the two of them in a different direction, Cinderella bursts “Did he show up for you too!” “If you are talking about the holy one, then yes, I saw him. Now stop talking, we must hurry and get you ready for the Lord’s announcement,” Atma quickly said, picking up the pace a little bit. Five minutes later and the duo reach the forge. “Fara, we’re here.” At this, a woman with red hair and the fiery eyes of a proud, noble Paladin of Zakarum turn around. “Cinderella, this is Fara. We will be getting you cleaned up and dressed nicely,” Atma explained, “When everything is ready, I will walk with you to the palace.”
Then Cinderella, Atma, and Fara enter Fara’s home. “Come here, the hot water, brush, and soap is in this room. Clean yourself up and I will be back shortly with your new clothes,” Fara said, handing Cinderella a clean towel, then left to get Cinderella the clothing. She quickly undresses and cleans herself up. Fara arrives with the fresh clothes and helps her dress quickly. Cinderella then leaves the house with Atma, to go to the palace and hear the announcement.
As she arrives, she spots her step-sister, and her step-sister spots her. Cinderella then quickly looked away hoping she wasn’t recognized. It wasn’t long when Lord Jerhyn appeared and made his announcement. “I will be hosting a party,” Jerhyn announced, “And, I will be looking for a bride-to-be.” He then went on and spoke of other things. Once he was done and has left, all the young women started making preparations to attend.
Next, Cinderella and Atma leave and head back to Fara’s house. “You must change back into those ratty things and I will walk you back home.” Atma said as they wended their way back. Upon arrival, Fara handed her the clothes and asked how everything went. She quickly changed as Atma recalled everything. They then left, moving quick enough so it doesn’t seem she was at the palace. “You should rub a little dirt on yourself,” Atma said quickly, “It will help to remove any suspicion.” “Ok, will you be coming back tomorrow so I can go to the party?” Cinderella asked as she rubbed dirt on herself. “Yes.” The house then came into sight, and Cinderella dreaded going back to her step-father and step-sister.
As she opened the door, Atma handed her five gold coins and, rather loudly, thanks her for the help and leaves. As soon as the door shut behind her, her step-sister demanded the money, which Cinderella reluctantly gave up. She went to the fire place and went to sleep. In the middle of the night, Cinderella wakes up to find Tyrael watching her. “Cinderella, when you wake up, you must leave the house and go to the well and there you will meet a man named Deckard Cain,” Tyrael explained what she must do, “Fara and Atma will help make sure you look the part of foreign princess and will teach you how to act around the Lords and Ladies.” With that said, the Archangel Tyrael turns and leaves. Two hours before sunrise, Cinderella snuck out of the house and walks to the well.
Finally, as she reaches the well, Cinderella sees an old man in a worn traveling cloak and holding a well worn staff standing there. As she walks up to him, she can hear him say “Stay awhile and listen,” to the adventurer she saw the day before with Fara. Deckard Cain turns and seeing her approach, “Are you Cinderella?” “Yes, I’m Cinderella,” she replied, “Are you Deckard Cain?” “I am indeed,” Cain answered, “I assume the Archangel sent you to me, to find the dress needed to capture the attention of the Sultan. Here it is,” Cain then pulls the dress from a strange cube covered with glyphs, “and Good Luck, you will need it.” Cinderella quickly goes to Atma’s and together with Fara’s help, gets ready for the party and learns how to handle herself in the presence of others. Cinderella then leaves to go to the party.
Once she reaches the party, everybody else there has already heard news of some fine young princess who came to attend. As she enters the great hall, all eyes turn in her direction, including Jerhyn’s. “My Lady,” asks Lord Jerhyn, “Would you like to dance?” “Why yes, yes I would.” Cinderella then starts dancing with the Lord. This goes on for quite sometime and no other Lady can capture his attention. Finally, as midnight nears, the young Sultan asks, “Cinderella, will you marry me?” At this, Cinderella excitedly says yes. Finally, her step-father and step-daughter recognize the young princess, and their faces drain of all blood at the realization of all that they did to her came back to haunt them. And so, Cinderella lives a long and happy life with her new husband.
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Just as the Scorpion hunts...
"Nothing is True. Everything is Permitted." ~ Ezio Auditore de Firenze
In which case I am under the impression you are taking this way too literally and there is a high chance you'll fuck this up by using a diablo/sanctuary theme.
An original idea certainly but since I'm unaware of the details of your assignment, I really don't know where you'll be going with this one.
You are identifying people in the story with people in sanctuary. Am not sure they expect that sort of thing in college.
It's a matter of ideas or what you perceived throughout the tale.
A Cinderella story is commonly used to describe a situation where an entity has progressed to a stage worthy of praise when it was difficult/impossible to do so.
So I guess with this idea in mind, you need fewer characters and more 'situations' to build such a story.
Just my idea though.
Venom I don't want to be cruel here...I found it a pleasant read, sincerely speaking.
But I hope for your own sake, that the lecturer who'll be marking you, has played diablo and he won't be asking questions like 'What the hell is the Angiris Council?"
Please consider carefully before submitting this assignment especially if it's of college-level.
I think you said 'elements that would make it a cinderella story'...
I have the nagging feeling that you have misunderstood. This is my honest opinion mate.
Hope you don't get pissed at me. You obviously have the skill to write up a very good story, it's just that I don't know if this one will fit the bill.