209K DPS DH - full set of gear for sale

  • #1
    ATTENTION MONEYBAGS! Are you tired of pounding your whale ivory keyboard in frustration because you can’t crush elites in Diablo underneath your heel like you do in real life? Are you tired of mere peasants claiming that they're better than you because they have Act III on farm? Did you roll a witch doctor? Look no further, and prepare to get as hard as your 200 carat diamond watch, because this set of gear will have you breezing through elites faster than you can say your triple-hyphenated last name. But don’t take my word for it, here is a keylogger (video) of me 5NV clearing Cydaea/Azmodan, with no deaths, in under 15 minutes. Each boss takes less than 30 seconds. Sit back in your polar bear skin armchair and swirl your Chateau Petrus 1998 as the soothing tones of Yo-yo Ma and I take you on an epic adventure of discovery.


    Me: Full set of end-game pure glass cannon DH gear:
    119k DPS w/o SS
    209k DPS w/ SS
    26%(capped at 25%) MS
    333% crit damage
    39.5% crit rate
    1.60 APS
    2150 DEX
    38 disc

    http://imgur.com/a/UdRIX


    You: Lazy trust fund baby who wants to exert your dominance over internet neckbeards. THIS IS A BETTER INVESTMENT THAN THAT BABY OCELOT YOU’VE BEEN WANTING. I’ve made over $1,400 after fees from farming Act 3 by myself. How much will you be able to make with this gear and your chain-gang of child laborers?

    You may be concerned about reflect damage elites. This isn’t unwarranted, considering the number of glass cannons that have difficulty with them. I didn’t encounter any during that run so here is a video of me popping reflect damage elites faster than you pop Vicadin.


    It’s simple, folks. You bid here on a total price for the ENTIRE SET of gear above. All transactions will be conducted through the RMAH. Jay Wilson gets his pound of flesh, you get a mind-blowing DH, and I get hard cash to spend on pharmaceuticals and women of dubious character. We'll then set up a time where I will individually list each piece of gear, in order of ascending desirability (upon mutual agreement), with the total price apportioned pro-rata to each piece. If you are too busy doing body shots off of Megan Fox, I'm sure you can order your DD-cup "personal assistant" to do it for you! Naked!

    Bid away, rich people! This will cost you less than the beluga caviar you feed your Siamese cats!

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    FAQ:

    Why not auction each piece individually? Because you can't spend all of your money and I want as much of your money as I can get by making a premium on the entire set.

    Can I bid on a specific piece of gear? No.

    Under your method aren’t I overpaying for the initial pieces, after which you could just bail and screw me over? Theoretically, yes, but if you can propose another method *WITHIN THE ToS*, which reduces your risk without increasing mine (of not selling everything), I will gladly listen. Furthermore, unless something’s gone horribly wrong during apportionment, you would only be overpaying by a fraction of the premium you were originally willing to pay.

    Are you a troll? I’ll be whatever you want if you buy my gear.


    STARTING AT $1K FOLKS
  • #2
    Bump in the night.
  • #3
    well i dont have money to buy all of your thing.. but that is a really nice one.

    but the way you sell stuf.. i give you 2 thumbs ..

    well thumbs doesnt give you any money. but .. at least more visual for those moneybags ..
  • #4
    Yeah I don't think anyone is gona buy all your gear at one time. Gl though...
  • #5
    50 bucks - moneybags! Moneybag!
  • #6
    Haha perhaps not, but entire WoW accounts were going for thousands back in their heyday. One can only hope.
  • #7
    Check for bumps when you shower guys.
  • #8
    11k life, no resists? Ill take my 75k dps without and 165k with ss along with 32k life and 400 resists any day of the week.
  • #9
    Excellent! Then this gear clearly isn't for you! Thanks for the bump!
  • #10
    Quote from wilson029

    11k life, no resists? Ill take my 75k dps without and 165k with ss along with 32k life and 400 resists any day of the week.


    ROFL, I am nearing 300k dps, and I have 15k hp. Trust me, when I say, you don't need life or resists, as a well played DH. Shadow Power with Gloom is easily enough to deal with whatever, and mostly everything is dead in a few hits anyways. I farm Act 3 Inferno, without any issues, running SS and SP with Gloom Rune.

    To the seller, you'd probably have better luck selling it on a site, like Playerauctions.


    PS: To all "glass cannon" DHs that have issues with RD packs, all you have to do, is pop that glorious Shadow Power, and go to town, you will not die, even with 15k hp, you stay at full health.
  • #11
    Cheers for the tip, Hex!

    Indeed, if you're good enough, you will never get hit, and HP or resists is no longer an issue. Maximizing DPS and move speed decreases the time it takes per run, and in a farm oriented game it's all about efficiency. Of course, if you're bad, careless, or both, then no, glass cannon play style is not for you.
  • #12
    I like beluga caviar :o
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