Hi, hello there, take a seat…what…you can’t sit because a goblin impaled you in the you-know-where, well that’s awkward! Well anyway let’s get started with this beginners guide for rpg’s. So you’re new to this and you would like some tips on how to deal in the fantastical world of rpg’s? Alright no problem, I’ve got some for you. Here are 5 tips for the unexperienced:
Tip 1:
You’ll die. Though this may sound rather final, there’s no need to be optimistic thinking you won’t die, because you will, a lot, and often quite unexpected. This is one of the fundamental designs of an rpg, gaining experience, which includes the experience of death! And then after you’ve magically come to life again trough one means or the other…you’ll die again. Get over it, if you want to play an rpg, you have to be ready for this, else there’s a little game called “happy happy sunny island 3” or something.
Tip 2:
Stack up on potions! “But we have floating orb thingies that give us hp now, so no need to stack up pot…” WRONG! This doesn’t mean you don’t have to bring any potions with you, because you can bet your ass that those floating orb thingies will be there in abundance when you’re at 90% hp, but when you’re down to 20%, there will be 1 floating orb thingy, and most likely, that will be in a place that it is either impossible to reach, or in a fire, which makes you lose 10% because you’re standing in a fire with nothing on but a “Light armour of Inflammable Goods”…way to go. And what about when you’re down on health and there are no mobs around, huh, did you ever think about that?...off course you didn’t, that’s why I’m here!
Tip 3:
BRING ANTIDOTE! This is a very important potion, that’s in the game for a reason, so use it. The whole idea of being poisoned is dying in a slow and painful way, most of the times without people knowing it. So _always_ bring antidote potions. “But I need the inventory space because I can’t…” WRONG AGAIN! *slaps*. How are you going to use those phat lewtz when you’re dead!...that’s right you won’t you …*sigh*…anyway let’s carry on.
Tip 4:
Armour upgrades. Yay, you’ve found a huge upgrade for your chestpiece, and then the most annoying thing will happen…another item drops with similair stats, but slight differences! Don’t go crying in the general chat about what you should choose, don’t even go whisper your friends (if you have any) for advice, just make up your damn mind and choose one; chances are, you’ll find a better one in 30 minutes anyway, so it makes you look stupid and dumb, do you want that?...that’s what I thought.
Tip 5:
Stat points. Okay, so this one might be tricky, because it requires you to do some reading. You know how when you hover over a certain stat (like VIT, STA, STR, WHTVR) it shows a little textbox that tells you what it does…yeah?...READ THAT! Once you’ll understand what your character is about, and what his strong points are, you’ll know what stats to fill out, and this will also help you with nr. 4, choosing your items. And remember, if you’re not sure…don’t spend them. “Like omg what are you saying, you’re saying I should keep stat points undefined for a while?” yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying, just play with your character and then you’ll feel what he needs. If it’s taking you 8 slashes with your axe to kill one enemy, you might want to put some points in your STR stat…that is…if that’s the stat that enhances that for your class, hence the “hard part” of stat dividing.
Well, if after all these tips you still can’t manage your way trough the game on your own, there’s one last, but final tip which will come in handy…read the manual. If you haven’t read the manual during the installation, that means you are a slow reader…no it doesn’t mean you’ve got a fast computer, because you know, and everyone else knows, that you don’t…because if you had such an awesome rig, you wouldn’t suck THAT much, and you’d be reading the booklet anyway. So get out there and kill some monsters!
Hi, hello there, take a seat…what…you can’t sit because a goblin impaled you in the you-know-where, well that’s awkward! Well anyway let’s get started with this beginners guide for rpg’s. So you’re new to this and you would like some tips on how to deal in the fantastical world of rpg’s? Alright no problem, I’ve got some for you. Here are 5 tips for the unexperienced:
Tip 1:
You’ll die. Though this may sound rather final, there’s no need to be optimistic thinking you won’t die, because you will, a lot, and often quite unexpected. This is one of the fundamental designs of an rpg, gaining experience, which includes the experience of death! And then after you’ve magically come to life again trough one means or the other…you’ll die again. Get over it, if you want to play an rpg, you have to be ready for this, else there’s a little game called “happy happy sunny island 3” or something.
Tip 2:
Stack up on potions! “But we have floating orb thingies that give us hp now, so no need to stack up pot…” WRONG! This doesn’t mean you don’t have to bring any potions with you, because you can bet your ass that those floating orb thingies will be there in abundance when you’re at 90% hp, but when you’re down to 20%, there will be 1 floating orb thingy, and most likely, that will be in a place that it is either impossible to reach, or in a fire, which makes you lose 10% because you’re standing in a fire with nothing on but a “Light armour of Inflammable Goods”…way to go. And what about when you’re down on health and there are no mobs around, huh, did you ever think about that?...off course you didn’t, that’s why I’m here!
Tip 3:
BRING ANTIDOTE! This is a very important potion, that’s in the game for a reason, so use it. The whole idea of being poisoned is dying in a slow and painful way, most of the times without people knowing it. So _always_ bring antidote potions. “But I need the inventory space because I can’t…” WRONG AGAIN! *slaps*. How are you going to use those phat lewtz when you’re dead!...that’s right you won’t you …*sigh*…anyway let’s carry on.
Tip 4:
Armour upgrades. Yay, you’ve found a huge upgrade for your chestpiece, and then the most annoying thing will happen…another item drops with similair stats, but slight differences! Don’t go crying in the general chat about what you should choose, don’t even go whisper your friends (if you have any) for advice, just make up your damn mind and choose one; chances are, you’ll find a better one in 30 minutes anyway, so it makes you look stupid and dumb, do you want that?...that’s what I thought.
Tip 5:
Stat points. Okay, so this one might be tricky, because it requires you to do some reading. You know how when you hover over a certain stat (like VIT, STA, STR, WHTVR) it shows a little textbox that tells you what it does…yeah?...READ THAT! Once you’ll understand what your character is about, and what his strong points are, you’ll know what stats to fill out, and this will also help you with nr. 4, choosing your items. And remember, if you’re not sure…don’t spend them. “Like omg what are you saying, you’re saying I should keep stat points undefined for a while?” yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying, just play with your character and then you’ll feel what he needs. If it’s taking you 8 slashes with your axe to kill one enemy, you might want to put some points in your STR stat…that is…if that’s the stat that enhances that for your class, hence the “hard part” of stat dividing.
Well, if after all these tips you still can’t manage your way trough the game on your own, there’s one last, but final tip which will come in handy…read the manual. If you haven’t read the manual during the installation, that means you are a slow reader…no it doesn’t mean you’ve got a fast computer, because you know, and everyone else knows, that you don’t…because if you had such an awesome rig, you wouldn’t suck THAT much, and you’d be reading the booklet anyway. So get out there and kill some monsters!
Lol.
Title: "How to survive..."
Tip 1: "You'll die".
6. Look sexy. A Role Playing Game is called an RPG for a reason. It means you have to amaze others with the imba lewt you have collected. Basically you will want to be wearing unisex, either solo or with your teammate, following the max-3-colors rule. You will see that monsters will simply move out of the way and be intimidated by your outstanding sex appeal. Who worries about item stats anyway? Dare to be different, and wear purple!
Integrate this into #4. when in doubt of which item to choose take the one that looks best.
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Tip 1:
You’ll die. Though this may sound rather final, there’s no need to be optimistic thinking you won’t die, because you will, a lot, and often quite unexpected. This is one of the fundamental designs of an rpg, gaining experience, which includes the experience of death! And then after you’ve magically come to life again trough one means or the other…you’ll die again. Get over it, if you want to play an rpg, you have to be ready for this, else there’s a little game called “happy happy sunny island 3” or something.
Tip 2:
Stack up on potions! “But we have floating orb thingies that give us hp now, so no need to stack up pot…” WRONG! This doesn’t mean you don’t have to bring any potions with you, because you can bet your ass that those floating orb thingies will be there in abundance when you’re at 90% hp, but when you’re down to 20%, there will be 1 floating orb thingy, and most likely, that will be in a place that it is either impossible to reach, or in a fire, which makes you lose 10% because you’re standing in a fire with nothing on but a “Light armour of Inflammable Goods”…way to go. And what about when you’re down on health and there are no mobs around, huh, did you ever think about that?...off course you didn’t, that’s why I’m here!
Tip 3:
BRING ANTIDOTE! This is a very important potion, that’s in the game for a reason, so use it. The whole idea of being poisoned is dying in a slow and painful way, most of the times without people knowing it. So _always_ bring antidote potions. “But I need the inventory space because I can’t…” WRONG AGAIN! *slaps*. How are you going to use those phat lewtz when you’re dead!...that’s right you won’t you …*sigh*…anyway let’s carry on.
Tip 4:
Armour upgrades. Yay, you’ve found a huge upgrade for your chestpiece, and then the most annoying thing will happen…another item drops with similair stats, but slight differences! Don’t go crying in the general chat about what you should choose, don’t even go whisper your friends (if you have any) for advice, just make up your damn mind and choose one; chances are, you’ll find a better one in 30 minutes anyway, so it makes you look stupid and dumb, do you want that?...that’s what I thought.
Tip 5:
Stat points. Okay, so this one might be tricky, because it requires you to do some reading. You know how when you hover over a certain stat (like VIT, STA, STR, WHTVR) it shows a little textbox that tells you what it does…yeah?...READ THAT! Once you’ll understand what your character is about, and what his strong points are, you’ll know what stats to fill out, and this will also help you with nr. 4, choosing your items. And remember, if you’re not sure…don’t spend them. “Like omg what are you saying, you’re saying I should keep stat points undefined for a while?” yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying, just play with your character and then you’ll feel what he needs. If it’s taking you 8 slashes with your axe to kill one enemy, you might want to put some points in your STR stat…that is…if that’s the stat that enhances that for your class, hence the “hard part” of stat dividing.
Well, if after all these tips you still can’t manage your way trough the game on your own, there’s one last, but final tip which will come in handy…read the manual. If you haven’t read the manual during the installation, that means you are a slow reader…no it doesn’t mean you’ve got a fast computer, because you know, and everyone else knows, that you don’t…because if you had such an awesome rig, you wouldn’t suck THAT much, and you’d be reading the booklet anyway. So get out there and kill some monsters!
Lol.
Title: "How to survive..."
Tip 1: "You'll die".
Integrate this into #4. when in doubt of which item to choose take the one that looks best.